So, way back when, I started a little hobby of making music videos based on TV shows. Fueled by a need for an obsessive creative outlet and praise by my godfather, I cranked out lots of these over the years. Some are better than others, but I was talking about them with a friend one day, and I figured what the hell. Let's dust off the old files and share some vids. I'll try too hard not to flood the blog with all of them right away, and instead, slowly dole them out one at a time.
Let's start with my favourite one. It's a slash vid, which is basically using a music video to convey a romantic/sexual relationship between two characters that was not present on the original show.
This Kaylee/Inara from the uber-fabulous (and short-lived) Firefly
"My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion (I know it's a cheesy song, but trust me... it works here.)
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Maplethorpe Ridge -- Road Map
It's Writing Wednesday! And that means another new installment of Maplethorpe Ridge. Below is your map to follow along, in case you're behind.Enjoy!
Prologue -- Aug 6, 2009
Chapter I - Welcome to Nolan (Part 1) -- Aug 10, 2009
Chapter I - Welcome to Nolan (Part 2) -- Aug 18, 2009
Chapter I - Welcome to Nolan (Part 3) -- Sept 23, 2009
Chapter I - Welcome to Nolan (Part 3)
Yes, yes. I know. It's been over a month since I last posted part of Chapter 1. I promise to be better and to keep up with my Writing Wednesdays. And now, on with the show.
*****
The next morning, there was another article in the paper about Crystal McMannis's babies. This time it was a birth announcement. Baby-Boy and Baby-Girl McMannis has been given names -- Matthew Adam and Meghan Claire McMannis, respectively. Quinn cut this article out of the paper, just as he had the previous one, put it in an envelope, and addressed it to Alabama.
*****
Matthew and Meghan slept in their cribs in the intensive care unit while Crystal, Cody, and Tyler looked on. They were so tiny, which brought Crystal to tears. Both Tyler and Cody comforted her. Just then, Dr. Gladstone came in and told them that there was a problem. Crystal looked frightened, as did Cody, while Tyler asked what was going on. Thomas told them that Meghan's blood type did not match that of either of her parents. Cody asked him what that was, and Thomas told him that it was Type O. he also explained that since Tyler was type A and Crystal was Type AB Meghan could not be Type O. Tyler looked at Crystal with a look of concern and fear. Crystal finally buckled after several minutes and sdmitted that she slept with Cody and that Meghan must be his child. Tyler freaked out and then asked Thomas about Matthew. He said that Matthew's was also strange, but if Cody was responsible for Meghan being Type O that Matthew must have a different father than Meghan, because his blood type was B. Now, Tyler was furious. "Who is the OTHER father?" Tyler screamed. Crystal felt faint and dizzy. When her head hit the cold hospital floor, she woke up in her bed, covered with sweat...a bad dream.
*****
Jen woke up on the couch of her apartment with a pounding headache. She staggered to the bathroom and grabbed a bottle of aspirin, took four of them, and went to the kitchen to make breakfast. On her way to the kitchen, she discovered the note from Blake on the floor. She read it, got a puzzled look on her face, and made breakfast. After she ate, she called the hospital and told them that she wouldn't be coming in because she was ill. Once she felt better, she picked up the phone and called Blake's parents in San Diego. Blake was not the type of girl to just pick up and leave town, even if it was for an emergency such as the note had said. Plus, Jen also remembered Blake telling her that her grandmother had died when she was in elementary school. Blake's mom, Evelyn, told Jen that she had remembered correctly; her mother had died fiften years earlier and that she hadn't heard from Blake in several days. Jen hung up the phone and crawled into the shower. her hangover would have to wait; the search for Blake Montgomery had begun.
*****
Tyler and Cody arrived at the hospital after Crystal had calmed herself down enough to fall back asleep. They watched her sleep for a while, then decided to go look in on the twins. They cooed at the glass of the ICU windows and smiled as Matthew and Meghan slept. Tyler went to hunt down Dr. Gladstone to get some more details on Crystal's homecoming tomorrow. After Tyler left, Nick came and looked at the twins. He then got into a heavy discussion with Cody.
"So, do you think that they could be your children?" He asked sarcastically.
"They can't be." Cody tried to be positive, but it wasn't really working. "Tyler and Crystal are very much in love. If even one of them is mine, it would destroy both of them."
"But you can't deny that the possibility is there. Can you?"
"Nick, what would Linda say if she knew that the possibility is there that they could be your children?" Cody retorted.
"Ah, one time, when compared to many, many encounters at the Nolan Inn, greatly reduces the chances that either one off them is my child." Nic paused to gauge Cody's reaction. After a moment, he continued. "how healthy was Tyler and Crystal's sex life? I mean, obviously it wasn't earth-shattering if she slept with you even once. But they did make love, didn't they?"
"From what I understood, Tyler enjoyed his wife, when he could."
"'When he could,' what kind of crap is that?"
"He is always busy with some case or another." Cody explained. "But this past yar, Tyler has had some more personal problems. That is why she came to me in the first place."
Nick raised an eyebrow, knowing that Cody was lying to him. "Let's hope that Chance is in our favor." Nick added; he was almost friendly.
"Amen to that."
Nick took off after grilling Cody. he did not need to get into another fight with Cody at the hospital. About ten minutes later, Cody received a light tap on his shoulder and was greeted by the smell of Chanel No5. He turned around. "Grandma!" Cody shouted. Rose Weber was volunteering at the hospital that morning and was very surprised to see her grandson there. Cody explained the situation about Tyler and Crystal. Rose offered to say a prayer for them and went off on her merry way but not before she had invited Cody, Tyler, Crystal, and Cody's choice of a date over for dinner. Cody accepted for all of them and kissed his grandma good-bye.
After she left, Cody resumed his gazing at the babies. He felt really bad about everything that had happened. He told them that they would never know about him and their mother. He kissed the glass and left. After Cody was clear out of sight, Quinn popped his head out from behind a potted plant, turned off the video camera, and left.
*****
Jen rushed to the door hoping that it was Blake and that she was knocking because she forgot her key. But it wasn't. It was Blake's parents, Evelyn and Robyn. The instant that Jen opened the door, Mrs. Montgomery started screaming about her "poor baby" and babbling about how she was never going to see her again. Every time that Mr. Montgomery tried to get a word in edgewise, Evelyn cut him off; each time she did that, Robyn seemed to grow shorter. Jen brushed it off as her over-active imagination. She showed them the note that was obviously in Blake's own handwriting. Evelyn began to cry, but when Robyn tried to comfort her, she shoved him away. She would only let Jen hold her. Jen offered to put the Montgomery's up for the night, but Evelyn said that she already made Robyn get them a room at the Nolan Inn. Jen told them that she had to work at six in the morning the next day, but she would be done by noon and they could go and get Tyler McMannis to do something to find Blake.
Just when she had shushed the Montgomery's and shooed them out the door, the phone rang. It was Cody; he invited her to have dinner with him grandparents and Tyler and Crystal (who had been released from the hospital). Jen accepted and said nothing about her disappearing roommate. She needed to have a good time. Cody arrived at eight-thirty and they drove off to the Weber's historic estate on the hill, just outside of Nolan.
Linda showed up at Maplethorpe ad Jen and Cody were leaving for the Weber's. She looked rather annoyed, so neither Jen nor Cody started a conversation with her. Jen and Cody pulled out, and Linda stormed inside. She knocked on the door labeled "Manager". A shirtless Lucas Montgomery answered the door with a cigarette in his mouth and a beer in his hand. He let Linda inside and offered her a smoke, which she accepted. They carried on about fifteen minutes of small talk before Linda got down to why she was actually there.
"Do you have any vacat apartments that are available for rent?"
"I may." Lucas replied. "If I remember correctly, someone on the second floor may be moving out."
"When will you know for sure?" Linda asked.
Lucas took a step closer to Linda and blew out a large plume of smoke from his nostrils. "When you give me what I want...what I need."
"And what is that exactly?" Linda asked coyly, knowing what was about to happen, yet pretending not to know in a flirty way that she was very good at conveying.
"Your security deposit."
And as he said this last line, which he has used many times before, Lucas kissed Linda's neck. Linda submitted, and eventually, the two of them became a tangle of sweaty flesh on the floor of Lucas's apartment.
*****
Quinn took the videotape out of the camera, put in the VCR, watched, and heard Cody and Nick's conversation outside the nursery. He saw Rose come and tap Cody's shoulder and saw Cody talking to the twins and kissing the window. After he watched it, he rewound the tape, took it out of the VCR, and put it in an envelope. Quinn addressed it to Alabama and went to bed, with a smile on his face.
*****
Cody and Jen pulled into the drive at the Weber Mansion. The butler, Sven, let them in and led them to the parlor where the other guests were waiting for them. Sven opened the door and there was Rose, Tyler and Crystal, sitting having drinks and trying to keep up polite conversation. Jen and Cody joined them and introductions were passed around. After about fifteen more minutes of drinks and small talk, Rose suggested that they adjourn to the dining room for dinner. Cody asked where Marc was and Rose told him that he was preparing a surprise and would meet them in the dining room.
Rose opened the French doors to the dining room and let out the most shrill, most blood-curdling scream a 76-year-old woman has ever screamed. Cody rushed to her, and then they all saw him. Marc Weber was slumped over at the table. There was a knife protruding from his back, and his shirt was stained red with his blood.
Tyler turned to Jennifer and said, "Welcome to Nolan, Jen."
The next morning, there was another article in the paper about Crystal McMannis's babies. This time it was a birth announcement. Baby-Boy and Baby-Girl McMannis has been given names -- Matthew Adam and Meghan Claire McMannis, respectively. Quinn cut this article out of the paper, just as he had the previous one, put it in an envelope, and addressed it to Alabama.
Matthew and Meghan slept in their cribs in the intensive care unit while Crystal, Cody, and Tyler looked on. They were so tiny, which brought Crystal to tears. Both Tyler and Cody comforted her. Just then, Dr. Gladstone came in and told them that there was a problem. Crystal looked frightened, as did Cody, while Tyler asked what was going on. Thomas told them that Meghan's blood type did not match that of either of her parents. Cody asked him what that was, and Thomas told him that it was Type O. he also explained that since Tyler was type A and Crystal was Type AB Meghan could not be Type O. Tyler looked at Crystal with a look of concern and fear. Crystal finally buckled after several minutes and sdmitted that she slept with Cody and that Meghan must be his child. Tyler freaked out and then asked Thomas about Matthew. He said that Matthew's was also strange, but if Cody was responsible for Meghan being Type O that Matthew must have a different father than Meghan, because his blood type was B. Now, Tyler was furious. "Who is the OTHER father?" Tyler screamed. Crystal felt faint and dizzy. When her head hit the cold hospital floor, she woke up in her bed, covered with sweat...a bad dream.
Jen woke up on the couch of her apartment with a pounding headache. She staggered to the bathroom and grabbed a bottle of aspirin, took four of them, and went to the kitchen to make breakfast. On her way to the kitchen, she discovered the note from Blake on the floor. She read it, got a puzzled look on her face, and made breakfast. After she ate, she called the hospital and told them that she wouldn't be coming in because she was ill. Once she felt better, she picked up the phone and called Blake's parents in San Diego. Blake was not the type of girl to just pick up and leave town, even if it was for an emergency such as the note had said. Plus, Jen also remembered Blake telling her that her grandmother had died when she was in elementary school. Blake's mom, Evelyn, told Jen that she had remembered correctly; her mother had died fiften years earlier and that she hadn't heard from Blake in several days. Jen hung up the phone and crawled into the shower. her hangover would have to wait; the search for Blake Montgomery had begun.
Tyler and Cody arrived at the hospital after Crystal had calmed herself down enough to fall back asleep. They watched her sleep for a while, then decided to go look in on the twins. They cooed at the glass of the ICU windows and smiled as Matthew and Meghan slept. Tyler went to hunt down Dr. Gladstone to get some more details on Crystal's homecoming tomorrow. After Tyler left, Nick came and looked at the twins. He then got into a heavy discussion with Cody.
"So, do you think that they could be your children?" He asked sarcastically.
"They can't be." Cody tried to be positive, but it wasn't really working. "Tyler and Crystal are very much in love. If even one of them is mine, it would destroy both of them."
"But you can't deny that the possibility is there. Can you?"
"Nick, what would Linda say if she knew that the possibility is there that they could be your children?" Cody retorted.
"Ah, one time, when compared to many, many encounters at the Nolan Inn, greatly reduces the chances that either one off them is my child." Nic paused to gauge Cody's reaction. After a moment, he continued. "how healthy was Tyler and Crystal's sex life? I mean, obviously it wasn't earth-shattering if she slept with you even once. But they did make love, didn't they?"
"From what I understood, Tyler enjoyed his wife, when he could."
"'When he could,' what kind of crap is that?"
"He is always busy with some case or another." Cody explained. "But this past yar, Tyler has had some more personal problems. That is why she came to me in the first place."
Nick raised an eyebrow, knowing that Cody was lying to him. "Let's hope that Chance is in our favor." Nick added; he was almost friendly.
"Amen to that."
Nick took off after grilling Cody. he did not need to get into another fight with Cody at the hospital. About ten minutes later, Cody received a light tap on his shoulder and was greeted by the smell of Chanel No5. He turned around. "Grandma!" Cody shouted. Rose Weber was volunteering at the hospital that morning and was very surprised to see her grandson there. Cody explained the situation about Tyler and Crystal. Rose offered to say a prayer for them and went off on her merry way but not before she had invited Cody, Tyler, Crystal, and Cody's choice of a date over for dinner. Cody accepted for all of them and kissed his grandma good-bye.
After she left, Cody resumed his gazing at the babies. He felt really bad about everything that had happened. He told them that they would never know about him and their mother. He kissed the glass and left. After Cody was clear out of sight, Quinn popped his head out from behind a potted plant, turned off the video camera, and left.
Jen rushed to the door hoping that it was Blake and that she was knocking because she forgot her key. But it wasn't. It was Blake's parents, Evelyn and Robyn. The instant that Jen opened the door, Mrs. Montgomery started screaming about her "poor baby" and babbling about how she was never going to see her again. Every time that Mr. Montgomery tried to get a word in edgewise, Evelyn cut him off; each time she did that, Robyn seemed to grow shorter. Jen brushed it off as her over-active imagination. She showed them the note that was obviously in Blake's own handwriting. Evelyn began to cry, but when Robyn tried to comfort her, she shoved him away. She would only let Jen hold her. Jen offered to put the Montgomery's up for the night, but Evelyn said that she already made Robyn get them a room at the Nolan Inn. Jen told them that she had to work at six in the morning the next day, but she would be done by noon and they could go and get Tyler McMannis to do something to find Blake.
Just when she had shushed the Montgomery's and shooed them out the door, the phone rang. It was Cody; he invited her to have dinner with him grandparents and Tyler and Crystal (who had been released from the hospital). Jen accepted and said nothing about her disappearing roommate. She needed to have a good time. Cody arrived at eight-thirty and they drove off to the Weber's historic estate on the hill, just outside of Nolan.
Linda showed up at Maplethorpe ad Jen and Cody were leaving for the Weber's. She looked rather annoyed, so neither Jen nor Cody started a conversation with her. Jen and Cody pulled out, and Linda stormed inside. She knocked on the door labeled "Manager". A shirtless Lucas Montgomery answered the door with a cigarette in his mouth and a beer in his hand. He let Linda inside and offered her a smoke, which she accepted. They carried on about fifteen minutes of small talk before Linda got down to why she was actually there.
"Do you have any vacat apartments that are available for rent?"
"I may." Lucas replied. "If I remember correctly, someone on the second floor may be moving out."
"When will you know for sure?" Linda asked.
Lucas took a step closer to Linda and blew out a large plume of smoke from his nostrils. "When you give me what I want...what I need."
"And what is that exactly?" Linda asked coyly, knowing what was about to happen, yet pretending not to know in a flirty way that she was very good at conveying.
"Your security deposit."
And as he said this last line, which he has used many times before, Lucas kissed Linda's neck. Linda submitted, and eventually, the two of them became a tangle of sweaty flesh on the floor of Lucas's apartment.
Quinn took the videotape out of the camera, put in the VCR, watched, and heard Cody and Nick's conversation outside the nursery. He saw Rose come and tap Cody's shoulder and saw Cody talking to the twins and kissing the window. After he watched it, he rewound the tape, took it out of the VCR, and put it in an envelope. Quinn addressed it to Alabama and went to bed, with a smile on his face.
Cody and Jen pulled into the drive at the Weber Mansion. The butler, Sven, let them in and led them to the parlor where the other guests were waiting for them. Sven opened the door and there was Rose, Tyler and Crystal, sitting having drinks and trying to keep up polite conversation. Jen and Cody joined them and introductions were passed around. After about fifteen more minutes of drinks and small talk, Rose suggested that they adjourn to the dining room for dinner. Cody asked where Marc was and Rose told him that he was preparing a surprise and would meet them in the dining room.
Rose opened the French doors to the dining room and let out the most shrill, most blood-curdling scream a 76-year-old woman has ever screamed. Cody rushed to her, and then they all saw him. Marc Weber was slumped over at the table. There was a knife protruding from his back, and his shirt was stained red with his blood.
Tyler turned to Jennifer and said, "Welcome to Nolan, Jen."
Monday, September 21, 2009
Yeah yeah yeah. Slap me in the face and call me lazy.
I had promised this blog (myself) that I would write more and be more attentive to my story and my writing. Well, apparently, that only worked for a few weeks. UGH.
Life happens, and work has been been very busy and sucky. At any rate, things are calming down now in my real life, so I have more time to devote to this. To that end, I am going to reinstate Writing Wednesdays starting this week.
To keep your appetites going, I posted two short stories tonight:
Electric Barbarella is a slash story. Its VERY sexually explicit, so dont read it if you dont want to read about gay sex in detail. It is also the first part of a two-part story.
Stupid Girl is the 2nd half of that two-part story. It is NOT sexually explicit, and can be read stand-alone without losing any of the meaning. Its what is called a rift story. For this one, I randomly (pulled from a hat) selected five characters from the Whedonverse and wrote a story based on them.
I am remembering that I do have more short stories out there, and I plan to publish those here as I find them. Thats just going to take time. I do intend to get through Maplethorpe Ridge as well. So, please hang tight.
Life happens, and work has been been very busy and sucky. At any rate, things are calming down now in my real life, so I have more time to devote to this. To that end, I am going to reinstate Writing Wednesdays starting this week.
To keep your appetites going, I posted two short stories tonight:
Electric Barbarella is a slash story. Its VERY sexually explicit, so dont read it if you dont want to read about gay sex in detail. It is also the first part of a two-part story.
Stupid Girl is the 2nd half of that two-part story. It is NOT sexually explicit, and can be read stand-alone without losing any of the meaning. Its what is called a rift story. For this one, I randomly (pulled from a hat) selected five characters from the Whedonverse and wrote a story based on them.
I am remembering that I do have more short stories out there, and I plan to publish those here as I find them. Thats just going to take time. I do intend to get through Maplethorpe Ridge as well. So, please hang tight.
Stupid Girl (Short Story)
After having narrowly escaping the clutches of The Domo, Zoë stood alone on the bridge of her ship, Serenity. Would the others even remember this night? She wondered. Will I be able to tell them that the Domo had poisoned them into thinking that they were all horny homosexuals with an electromagnetic pulse? Why wasn’t I affected? Will everything be alright?
“I can answer that question for you,” a perky female voice said from no where.
“Who the hell are you?” Zoë asked the empty bridge.
A blue and white breezeless tornado of light appeared in front of her. Zoë flinched at the sight, expecting to be blown away by its force. She wasn’t, and she watched in awe as a beautiful brunette woman wearing a floor-length white evening gown materialized from nothingness.
“Everything’s going to be just fine,” the woman said.
“You haven’t answered my question,” Zoë said. “Who are you?”
“Don’t you recognize me?” The woman replied. She paused a bit thinking and continued,
“Duh. Of course you don’t. I’m Cordelia Chase.”
“Where did you come from? What happened here tonight?” Zoë babbled. “I have so many questions.”
“Zoë,” Cordelia began patiently. “I’m one of The Powers That Be.” Cordelia sauntered up next to Zoë and put her arm around her. “Your friends…and Jayne…won’t remember anything that happened tonight in the morning. That is, if there is a morning to wake up to.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I was testing you, Zoë,” Cordelia explained. “I’ve been watching you, waiting for when the time was right.”
“So, this was just a test,” Zoë was clearly trying to wrap her head around what Cordelia was tying to say. “And this Domo thing…you did that?”
“Sort of…the Domo are real. Their threat to the Outer Rim is real too, but I sent them here as a test for you—to see if you could save your friends…and Jayne...on your own. And you passed.”
“So what now?” Zoë asked. “And what about this whole ‘if there is a morning’ thing?”
“I can explain,” Cordelia replied. “But not here.”
Cordelia waved her arms in a big circle three times and in another cyclone of light, both Zoë and Cordelia were gone. The next thing Zoë knew, she and Cordelia were standing alone in what appeared to be a forest, but Zoë knew that it must be a trick.
“Where are we?” she demanded to know.
“We’re in the rain forest,” Cordelia said matter-of-factly. “This is where it will all end…” she trailed off dreamily. “…but hopefully not. That’s why we’re here.”
“This can’t be. There are no ‘rain forests’ on any world that I have ever heard of,” Zoë wasn’t buying Cordelia’s story. “Except maybe in the virtual reality bars in Ariel City… Did you take me to the Core?”
“No. This is Earth.”
“It can’t be,” Zoë said shakily with a tear forming in her eye. “Earth is dead. Nothing can live there. This must be a trick.”
“No, I assure you, this is Earth. Earth of the year 2005.”
Zoë’s eyes perked up, and she began to look excited.
“Hold your horses, Zoë,” Cordelia cautioned. “We have work to do, and there isn’t much time. I have to get the others.”
“Others?”
“The team...compadres…posse?” Cordelia was struggling not to be short with Zoë. “Once everyone is together, I can explain. There’s not time to explain the whole thing five times. So, wait here, and I’ll be back.”
“But why am I here?”
“To help me save the world…” Cordelia answered as she disappeared in her tornado of light. Zoë barely had time to think. In a flash, Cordelia was back accompanied by another woman—a brunette with blonde and red streaks in her hair. She was dressed all in leather with long leather gloves covering her hands.
“Zoë this is Gwen,” Cordelia introduced the two women. “Zoë can explain what’s going on.” Cordeila waved her arms and vanished.
“Gwen is it?”
“Yes.”
“Well, I’m not exactly sure what’s going on,” Zoë began, “I think that we’re supposed to help this woman—“
Zoë was cut off by Cordelia’s instant return with a man this time. She didn’t even bother to introduce this newcomer to Zoë and Gwen before vanishing again.
“Riley Finn,” he introduced himself holding out his right hand to Gwen.
“Gwen,” she replied not shaking his hand. “I don’t touch people.”
“Okay,” Riley was obviously creeped out. “And you are?”
“Zoë,” she replied looking Riley up and down, sizing him up. He was tall, and his muscled arms were practically bursting out of his tight t-shirt.
Cordelia materialized with the fifth member of the team, before anything else could be said.
“Sheesh,” Cordelia gasped. “This one-at-a-time-ing is going to be the death of me.” She burst out laughing, and vanished again in a flash of light.
“Riley Finn.” Riley said extending a hand to the blonde new guy.
“Andrew,” he replied shaking his hand looking Riley up and down.
“This is Gwen and Zoë,” Riley finished the introductions.
Cordelia reappeared with another young woman. Her hair was some color between blonde and brown, and she was the shortest of the group.
“Everyone,” Cordelia announced. “This is Fred.”
“Now that everyone is here, why don’t you explain what exactly is going on and why we’re all here?” Zoë asked exasperated with this whole situation.
“Excellent idea, Zoë,” Cordelia began…
“It all started about three or four years ago, in this time frame. A man and a woman fell into this forbidden relationship. He was demon fighter on the outs with his friends. She was a lawyer at an evil law firm—“
Fred interrupted, “You’re speaking of Lilah and Wesley, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” Cordelia continued. “Lilah and Wesley. Lilah was killed—“
“By you,” Gwen interrupted this time. “If I remember correctly.”
“Yes, but I was being controlled by an ancient evil power hell bent on enslaving the Earth. Let’s try to keep all the details—“
“Wait!” Zoë brought the conversation to a screeching halt. “You all know each other?”
“I don’t know any of these people,” Riley replied.
“Kinda,” Andrew said. “I know Fred, because I visited LA last year a few times to help her and Angel. But I thought you died when Illyria hijacked your body?”
“I can explain,” Fred said.
“And I only really know Cordelia by reputation,” Andrew continued. “We went to high school together in Sunnydale.” He paused to examine Gwen. “You, I don’t know.”
“I’m Gwen. I too helped Angel, Fred, Cordelia, and the gang a while back. How’s Charles?” She specifically directed her question at Fred.
“Charles is in a coma,” she said flatly. “He nearly died saving Los Angeles from the apocalypse with Angel, Spike, and Illyria.”
“Can we do this later?!?” Cordelia busted in. “We need to get started, and we’ll never get there if I don’t tell this story.”
There were nods of agreement around the circle, and Cordelia continued: “After Lilah died, she was given a final mission by the Senior Partners. To bring Angel and his friends into Wolfram and Hart. She did just that. And for her efforts, she was rewarded—with immortality, among other things. In the past two years, she’s built herself a fortress from which she can look down on all the things going on around the world. She kept an eye on Wesley all the time, because her heart still loved him. Then, in the apocalypse that Fred spoke of, Wesley was killed. Stricken by grief, Lilah decided that the best way to get over it is to destroy the earth.”
“Been there…done that,” Andrew mumbled.
“Hush!” Cordelia demanded. “Lilah is way more powerful than Willow ever could have hoped to be.” She cleared her throat. “My task is to stop her. I can’t do this on my own, which is why I’ve enlisted all of you to help.”
“Kidnapped is more like it,” Zoë added.
“Call it what you want,” she said. “But you all have a stake in this. If Lilah destroys the Earth, you’ll all die. And Zoë, neither you nor any of your friends will even exist in the future. The universe as you know it will cease to exist. Sure, I’m sure that some form of the universe will sill be around. But it won’t be this. It won’t be what you know.”
“So how do we stop her,” Riley asked.
“Glad you asked, hot stuff,” Cordelia replied. “Lilah has the elements of Thallia. With these she can open a portal to a black hole and basically suck the earth inside out.”
Cordelia surveyed the group for signs of hopelessness.
“So what, we just take away this Thallia stuff, and she’s stopped right?” Andrew asked.
“It’s not that simple Nerd-O. Lilah’s already started the ritual to open the portal. And we can’t get near her fortress with out the help of two more people—Anthony and Selena. They are the key to Lilah’s undoing, and she has them locked away at opposite ends of the world. We need to rescue each of them, bring them to Lilah’s fortress, and they will stop Lilah from sucking the world inside out.”
“So, why us?” Gwen asked. “What makes the five of us so special?”
“Yeah,” Andrew and Riley agreed in unison.
“Each of you has your own abilities, each of you has a stake in what happens here today, and each of you is destined for great things,” Cordelia explained.
“What are you talking about?” Fred asked.
“Listen, there’s really not time to—“
“You’d better explain yourself, missy,” Zoë interrupted, “or I’m not going anywhere or doing anything.”
“Ugh. Fine,” Cordeila relented. “Fred, you and Andrew are destined to take over Wolfram and Hart and bring it down from the inside out, ending centuries of evil all over the world. Riley, you and Buffy are destined to be reunited and your granddaughter will be the first prime minister of a unified Earth. Zoë, you and your band of friends in the future will lead a rebellion that will bring an end to the Alliance and bring prosperity to those suffering in the Outer Rim.”
“And me,” Gwen asked, uncharacteristically meekly. “What’s my great purpose in this life?”
“Gwen, honey, isn’t it obvious?” Cordelia looked upon her blank face and decided that she needed more of an explanation. “Gwen, you are destined to save the world alongside your great-great-great-great-great-great…oh you get the point, granddaughter.”
Gwen looked to Zoë. Zoë looked back at Gwen, and then both of the women shot glances
at Cordelia.
“What?” She said. “You and Gunn—sorry, Charles—get together, raise a family, have many beautiful children. Zoë here is your descendant. But none of this is ever going to happen if we don’t take care of Lilah and stop her from sucking the whole world inside out. Are you with me?”
“Hell yeah!” Riley yelled with true military forcefulness.
“Sounds like fun,” Zoë cheered, sarcastically.
Selena
“I don’t see why we had to split up,” Andrew whined.
“Because, Squirt, twenty-three hours is not enough time for all six of us to get this job done,” Riley explained.
“Don’t call me Squirt.”
“Come on, boys,” Fred interjected. “Play nice. We still need to rescue Selena and meet up with the others.”
Fred, Riley, and Andrew were sent via Cordelia’s light tornado the Australian outback.
Luckily, Cordy had done her research in advance and knew roughly where Andrew and Selena were being held. Unfortunately for this half of the team, neither Selena nor her demon guard were visible anywhere in the vicinity.
Andrew pulled a gismo that looked strikingly similar to a control for a remote-control car from his pocket and pressed a button on the side of it. The gismo lit up and began steadily beeping.
“What’s that?” Riley asked examining Andrew’s gismo.
“You should know, Mr. Initiative,” Andrew teased. “It’s a demon tracker. Cordelia told me that Lilah is most likely using Ha’aal demons to guard these guys. They give off a very distinct pheromone.”
“I know all about the Ha’aal,” harrumphed Riley.
The unlikely threesome walked in the barren wilderness in silence, with Andrew slightly in the lead. The beeping of the device kept its constant meter. Andrew was the first to break the silence.
“So, you never explained the whole back from the dead thing,” he directed toward Fred.
“It’s relatively simple, Andrew,” Fred explained. “You should be able to figure it out. But I’ll tell my story anyway.”
Riley looked confused.
“Fred died when Illyria took over her body. That is true. What is also true is that Illyria retained all of Fred’s memories: her time in Pylea, her love for Gunn and Wes, graduate school…everything. Angel and Wesley took away most of Illyria’s super powers to prevent her from exploding and destroying the city in the process. The human body was simply not enough to contain the essence of the god. After Angel and the others defeated the army sent by the Senior Partners, Illyria began to go insane. She could no longer distinguish herself from Fred, and it was driving her mad. That’s when they decided to go to South America and pay a visit to Willow. Willow used a spell that removed Fred’s memories and residual essence from Illyria. And Illyria was sane again. She and Spike decided to return to Los Angeles and keep the vamps and demonies under control.”
“That doesn’t explain—“ Fred cut Andrew off and continued.
“The spell that Willow used to rid Illyria of Fred was a transference spell. She shunted all the residual Fred from Illyria to the Buffybot.”
“You can do that?” Riley asked.
“Willow can do anything she sets her mind too,” Andrew replied in awe.
“After Spike and Illyria returned to LA and Angel left to join Nina and her family, Willow decided that if the Buffybot was going to be a home for Fred’s memories, that she should look like Fred. Six months later, here I am. Pretty neat, huh?”
“That’s one word for it,” Riley said.
The beeping of Andrew’s gismo grew louder and faster. “I think we’re getting close,” he said.
“Close to what?” Riley asked. “I don’t see anything.”
“There!” Andrew pointed directly ahead.
“There’s nothing there.”
Andrew put his demon tracker down, picked up a hefty stone, and heaved it forward. It drifted in midair for a second then stopped abruptly and fell to the ground with a thud. Then, as if from nowhere, the Ha’aal demon appeared before them. It stood well over seven feet tall and oozed blue pus from every pore. The stench was almost unbearable.
Riley drew his gun from the back of his pants and fired four rounds straight into the demon’s chest. Andrew laughed, “you should know that you can’t shoot a Ha’aal.”
And as if to illustrate his point, the Ha’aal demon walked closer to them pulling the bullets from its dark, gooey flesh and throwing them back at them. If it had a mouth, it would have been laughing at them.
“So, what now?” Riley looked worried.
Andrew looked to Fred. Fred looked at Riley. Riley looked to Andrew, to the demon, and back to Fred. Fred looked at the demon and a look of determination and triumph spread across her face. She ran to it. It held out a tentacled arm and stopped her like a thirteen-year-old will keep his seven-year-old brother at bay. Fred reached up and snapped the bone in its forearm three times. The Ha’aal hollered in pain. Fred kicked the demon as hard as she could in the stomach-area. The demon fell to the dirt. She grabbed its head and twisted with all her might, and the blue, oozy thing popped right off of its neck. Fred held the head triumphantly above her own head. The body teetered for a few seconds then fell to the ground.
“That’s how you kill a Ha’aal demon,” Andrew snarked.
“But where did it come from?” Riley asked. “It just appeared from no where.”
“Not no where,” Fred said, tossing the head aside and wiping her hands on her pants. “From here.” Fred walked up to an invisible wall and leaned against it.
Andrew felt along the invisible wall and found what felt like a latch. He pulled on it, and an invisible door opened, revealing a stairway. Riley led the way up the stairs with his gun drawn. Fred went next, and Andrew brought up the rear.
Lilah obviously thought that no one would be able to defeat her Ha’aal at the door. Fortunately for them (unfortunately for Lilah) she was wrong. Selena’s prison was a maze of stairways and narrow halls. Everything was painted black. Every twenty feet there was a dim red light, it made it very difficult for Riley, Andrew, and Fred to make their way around. They could have easily been lost in the maze for the rest of their lives, but again luck was on their side. Fred, after all, was a robot. She kept track of their steps and directions, and within an hour they reached the end. The final stairway led up what felt to Andrew at least thirty stories. Fred assured him that in reality it was only three and a half. The top of the stairs was what on initial inspection appeared to be a dead end. There was a red light directly above them. And Fred noticed that a tiny bump on the left wall was casting a shadow. Andrew pressed the button, and a small panel opened in the ceiling.
“How do we get up there?” Andrew wondered aloud.
His question was answered without words when Fred lifted Riley off the ground and tossed him through the opening.
“Whoa.”
“You’re next, Squirt,” Fred said. And before Andrew could object, he found himself next to Riley on the floor of a small room filled with light. Fred leapt up and joined the men. The walls of this room consisted solely of glass, as did the ceiling. The change from the darkness below to the brightness above had momentarily blinded Riley and Andrew, but soon they adapted.
There, they saw her. A small-ish woman, barely twenty-four years old with long black hair flowing down her back wearing only a white cotton bed gown stood in one corner of the room examining her rescuers.
“We’re here to rescue you,” Riley told the woman.
“We have to hurry, there’s no time,” Selena replied. She walked fast in her bare feet and dropped down the hole in the floor through which everyone had arrived.
“Ungrateful bitch,” Riley replied looking at Andrew.
Anthony
Cordelia planned her attack well, and her initial meeting place for her team was right outside Lilah’s other invisible prison. After taking Riley, Andrew, and Fred to Australia, she, Gwen, and Zoë got to their task of rescuing Selena’s twin—Anthony—from his captor.
The three women walked about half a mile through the rain forest toward where Cordelia’s memory told her Anthony was being held.
“What’s with the gloves, Grandma,” Zoë asked Gwen. “It’s like a million degrees out here.”
Gwen replied by removing her right glove. She bent down and picked up a snake with her left hand. She held the snake in the middle with her left (gloved) hand and quickly grasped the snake an inch below its head with her right. Blue electricity shot out of her hand. The snake twitched and shook violently. Smoke curled up from its body. The twitching stopped, and Gwen dropped the dead snake to the ground. “That’s why I wear the gloves, and don’t call me Grandma,” she added.
Zoë replied silently with a smile.
“There it is,” Cordelia said a minute later.
“I don’t see anything,” Zoë countered.
“It’s invisible,” Cordelia replied.
“Of course it is,” Gwen said.
“How do we—“ Zoë began. But she was interrupted when a blue, gooey, foul-smelling demon appeared before them.
The Ha’aal demon lunged for Cordelia. Cordelia vanished before the tentacles touched her. The Ha’aal swung through empty air, and Cordelia reappeared a moment later.
“Nice trick,” Gwen said.
“Thanks.”
Zoë drew her gun and fired several rounds into the demon. Nothing happened. It didn’t even seem to notice the lead slugs in its flesh.
“Gwen,” she said. “Looks like you’ll have to take this one.”
Gwen removed her gloves and charged the demon. “Come on bitch!” She yelled. “Come and get me!”
The Ha’aal demon grabbed Gwen and lifted her off the ground. Gwen grabbed back and held onto the sides of the demon’s head with both hands. Its flesh sizzled. Electricity crackled around all of them. Zoë held her nose against the stench of frying Ha’aal demon. The demon released Gwen from his grasp, but Gwen held on, dangling from the thing’s temples. The Ha’aal let out a low groan and dropped to the ground. Gwen released it and kicked it hard in the face.
“Come on,” Cordelia urged. “Time is short, and the Ha’aal won’t stay passed out for long.”
Cordelia led the way to the invisible door and pointed at the right spot. Zoë kicked it in.
“That was unnecessary,” Cordelia said. “The button’s right there.”
“Let’s get this over with,” Zoë replied.
The inside of this invisible prison was identical to Selena’s. As they made their way through the black halls of stairs, Gwen decided to get some answers.
“I thought you died,” she asked Cordelia.
“I did.”
“Oh.”
“I…transitioned,” Cordelia explained. “I think that’s what they called it. I was a great asset to the Powers when I was a human, and they gave me this afterlife. I suppose you could say I’m a Power in training. This is my first mission.”
“But how did you know about me,” Zoë asked, “in the future?”
“Time isn’t exactly linear,” Cordelia explained. “That’s one of the first things they teach you. It’s kinda like being in a room full of televisions all showing different time periods of what’s going on around the universe. It’s rather intimidating.”
“What’s a television?” Zoë asked.
“So, what’s to stop you from going to the past and changing things?” Gwen asked.
“I said not exactly linear,” Cordelia tried to explain. “We can go forward, but not back.”
“Huh?”
“Because the future hasn’t happened yet. Anything is possible. And we can see each possibility unfold.”
“So, you know what will happen if we don’t stop Lilah in time,” Zoë commented.
“Trust me, it isn’t pretty.”
No more was said of time travel. The ladies found Anthony in the same way Selena was found. And Gwen, Zoë, and Cordelia escorted him from his invisible prison. Once outside a flash of light signaled the disintegration of the invisible building.
“Now what?” Gwen asked.
“Now, we wait for the signal,” Cordelia replied.
Thallia
After about twenty minutes of sitting in the forest staring at each other, Cordelia stood up and stared at the sky.
“Oooh…” Gwen teased. “My spidey sense is tingling.”
Anthony shot Gwen a nasty look. Zoë rolled her eyes. She still couldn’t believe that she was wrapped up in all this mess. People back from the dead, an evil lawyer hell-bent on sucking the world inside out, a set of twins held captive in invisible prisons, and to top it all off, she was fighting along side her very distant relative. She shook her head in disbelief.
“It’s time,” Cordelia said. Without another word, she vanished in a poof of light.
Seconds later, she poofed back to Zoë, Gwen, and Anthony along with Fred, Andrew, Riley, and Selena.
“Selena!” Andrew shouted.
“Andrew!” Selena shouted back and went to her brother.
“NO!” Cordelia yelled stepping between the reunited twins. “Not yet.”
“Not yet, what?” Riley asked impatiently. “I thought we were in a time crunch, here.”
“We are. But if they touch each other they’ll be taken to Thallia.”
“Where’s that?” Andrew asked.
“Thallia is our sister,” Selena replied.
“She was banished from this world centuries ago,” Anthony explained. “She was evil. Pure evil. The Powers banished her to stop exactly what Lilah is trying to do now.”
“They divided her body into five pieces and imprisoned each inside a talisman,” Selena continued. “Once the pieces are reassembled and the proper ritual performed, Thallia will be reborn. Only she can open the portal of Rubidius.”
“And that’s what’s going to suck the world inside out,” Gwen confirmed.
“Yep,” Cordelia replied. “Okay. Here’s the plan…” Cordelia laid out the plan before the eight of them, and once they were done everyone joined hands starting with Selena and ending with Anthony. When Selena took Anthony’s hand, all eight of them disappeared.
“Patefacio vestri porta ut abyssus per combibo eternus nex orbis terrarum,” Lilah chanted this phrase over and over. A young woman with blonde locks of hair flowing down her back hovered about the center of a pentagram inscribed inside a circle painted on the floor. “Patefacio vestri porta ut abyssus per combibo eternus nex orbis terrarum.”
The twins mode of transport was much less dramatic than Cordelia’s, and Lilah did not even notice the arrival of the eight visitors. Two shots were fired at exactly the same time. Each hit Lilah precisely on target. She fell to the floor.
“Thalia!” Selena and Anthony shouted in unison running toward their lost-and-now-found sister.
“You can not stop what has already begun.” Ominous words from a crumpled Lilah on the floor. She stood and faced the intruders. “Stupid mortals. I can’t be killed with your mortal weapons,” she said to a dumbfounded Zoë and Riley. “Cordy! Nice to see you again. You should have prepared your minions better.”
“Stuff it,” Cordelia replied. “You don’t get to call me Cordy.”
Anthony and Selena dragged Thalia out of Lilah’s pentagram. A spherical hole appeared in the spot where Thalia had been during the ritual. It was about the size of a golf ball and steadily growing. “See,” Lilah said. “It has begun.”
“You never loved Wesley!” Fred shrieked at Lilah charging her.
Fred ran full-on into Lilah with incredible force. She held her pinned against the wall.
“My Fred, you certainly have grown big and strong. Milk certainly did your body good.”
“Lilah, you can’t do this,” Cordelia pleaded. “Have you thought about what you’re doing? The Earth and everything and everyone on it—including you—will be destroyed. Is that what you want?”
“It will end,” she replied flatly. “It always ends.”
Fred punched Lilah square in the face breaking her nose.
“You’re lucky that I heal fast, Robo-Slut.”
Lilah was still unable to escape from Fred’s grasp.
“What are we supposed to do,” Andrew asked.
“Help,” Riley answered.
Andrew did nothing. Riley did nothing. Zoë and Gwen exchanged a glance and both charged at Lilah who was still pinned against the wall by Fred. Gwen reached them first, but unfortunately her aim was off and she ran straight into Fred’s back. The shock was instant, loud, and bright. Fred and Gwen fell to the floor releasing Lilah. Smoke curled up from Fred’s mouth and nostrils; her eyes stayed fixed and open. Zoë arrived an instant later, leaping over the bodies on the floor and pinned Lilah back against the wall.
“You’re no match for me, Future Bitch,” Lilah yelled shoving Zoë back.
The two of them began throwing punches. First Lilah landed a right into Zoë’s face, and Zoë countered with a punch to Lilah’s already broken nose. The two continued this back and forth fight as Gwen tried to get back to her feet.
“Do something you two!” She shouted.
Andrew looked around the room trying to find some sort of a weapon. Riley drew his gun and tried to aim at Lilah, but the two fighting women were moving too fast and Zoë kept drifting in and out of his sights.
“Oh, you two are useless!” Gwen groaned. She rolled over and lunged for Lilah’s ankles. Lilah kicked her in the face, which scooted her back about five feet.
Meanwhile, Cordelia was talking with the triplets and the hole in the world was growing larger. It was now the size of a ripe cantaloupe and still steadily growing. Gwen could feel its pull already.
“It’s begun,” Lilah groaned kicking Zoë away from her enough to break free. “Soon, the Earth and everything on it will be gone.”
“We can’t let you do this,” Andrew said rather forcefully.
Riley and Andrew appeared on either side of Lilah. Lilah turned toward Riley and winked at him. Riley gave her a swift and very hard kick in the chest and pushed her into Andrew. Andrew jumped up and climbed onto Lilah’s back wrapping his arms around her neck.
“Silly boy,” she laughed. “I’m dead. I don’t need to breathe.”
Lilah began to spin around trying to toss Andrew from her back. Riley pulled his gun and shot Lilah again. She recoiled but still remained vertical. Gwen tried again with the ankles, and this time she was able to hold on—to both of them. Andrew pulled back. Gwen pulled forward, and Lilah fell to the ground.
“Hold the bitch down,” Zoë shouted.
The noise coming from the portal was growing so loud that Zoë had to shout to have any chance of being heard over it. The growing sphere had now reached the ceiling. Soon they would all be engulfed in its blackness.
Riley fired his gun once more and a dark red circle appeared on Lilah’s forhead.
“They sure do grow ‘em dumb in Iowa, don’t they,” Lilah laughed still pinned to the floor.
That was the last straw. Riley gave Zoë a knowing glance and they hoisted Lilah off the floor. The four of them carried her over the smoldering robot that looked like Fred and on the count of three they tossed the screaming bitch into the portal. The instant she breached the periphery of the sphere, Lilah was sucked into a tiny point of light and vanished from sight.
The hole kept growing.
“What now?” Gwen asked. “I thought the hole would close.”
“Why would you think that?” Andrew snarked back. “The only way to close The Portal of Rubidius—“
“Is for me to go through it,” Thallia finished Andrew’s sentence.
Selena and Andrew looked longingly at their sister but said nothing. Cordelia nodded, and Thallia walked up to the edge of the portal. She looked around at everyone, smiled at her brother and sister, and then jumped into the sphere. And just like Lilah, she too vanished into a point of light at the center. Without any prompting or any warning, Andrew and Selena joined hands and ran into the sphere. Within moments the sphere retracted. Everything in Lilah’s fortress was as it was before.
“I was going to say that,” Andrew said. “She didn’t let me finish.” Riley tussled Andrew’s hair and smiled.
Cordelia smiled at her assembled team. “I did it,” she said toward the ceiling.
“You mean, ‘we’ did it,” Zoë corrected.
“Yes, Zoë, we did it. We stopped Lilah and stopped the earth from being sucked inside out.”
“Not to bad for a first mission, eh?” Gwen teased.
“What about Fred,” Zoë asked.
“I can fix her,” Andrew said solemnly.
“Good job, Squirt,” Riley said tussling his hair again.
“Guh! Don’t call me Squirt!”
Zoë
“And that’s it?” Wash asked his wife.
“That’s it,” she replied.
The two of them were laying naked in bed together. Wash rolled onto his side and looked longingly at Zoë.
“And this Gwen could shoot electricity out from her hands?”
“No,” she laughed, “it didn’t shoot out. She just conducted it with her touch.”
“And she’s your grandmother?”
“Something like that,” Zoë smiled.
“I don’t believe it,” Wash said rolling onto his back.
They both sighed a deep sigh.
“So, did this Cordelia tell you anything else about the future?” Wash prodded. “Anything about us?”
“Nope,” Zoë replied. She turned to Wash and ran her index finger around his bare chest. “But I’ve got another story for you.”
“You do?” Wash was intrigued.
“Do you remember last night?”
“I can answer that question for you,” a perky female voice said from no where.
“Who the hell are you?” Zoë asked the empty bridge.
A blue and white breezeless tornado of light appeared in front of her. Zoë flinched at the sight, expecting to be blown away by its force. She wasn’t, and she watched in awe as a beautiful brunette woman wearing a floor-length white evening gown materialized from nothingness.
“Everything’s going to be just fine,” the woman said.
“You haven’t answered my question,” Zoë said. “Who are you?”
“Don’t you recognize me?” The woman replied. She paused a bit thinking and continued,
“Duh. Of course you don’t. I’m Cordelia Chase.”
“Where did you come from? What happened here tonight?” Zoë babbled. “I have so many questions.”
“Zoë,” Cordelia began patiently. “I’m one of The Powers That Be.” Cordelia sauntered up next to Zoë and put her arm around her. “Your friends…and Jayne…won’t remember anything that happened tonight in the morning. That is, if there is a morning to wake up to.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I was testing you, Zoë,” Cordelia explained. “I’ve been watching you, waiting for when the time was right.”
“So, this was just a test,” Zoë was clearly trying to wrap her head around what Cordelia was tying to say. “And this Domo thing…you did that?”
“Sort of…the Domo are real. Their threat to the Outer Rim is real too, but I sent them here as a test for you—to see if you could save your friends…and Jayne...on your own. And you passed.”
“So what now?” Zoë asked. “And what about this whole ‘if there is a morning’ thing?”
“I can explain,” Cordelia replied. “But not here.”
Cordelia waved her arms in a big circle three times and in another cyclone of light, both Zoë and Cordelia were gone. The next thing Zoë knew, she and Cordelia were standing alone in what appeared to be a forest, but Zoë knew that it must be a trick.
“Where are we?” she demanded to know.
“We’re in the rain forest,” Cordelia said matter-of-factly. “This is where it will all end…” she trailed off dreamily. “…but hopefully not. That’s why we’re here.”
“This can’t be. There are no ‘rain forests’ on any world that I have ever heard of,” Zoë wasn’t buying Cordelia’s story. “Except maybe in the virtual reality bars in Ariel City… Did you take me to the Core?”
“No. This is Earth.”
“It can’t be,” Zoë said shakily with a tear forming in her eye. “Earth is dead. Nothing can live there. This must be a trick.”
“No, I assure you, this is Earth. Earth of the year 2005.”
Zoë’s eyes perked up, and she began to look excited.
“Hold your horses, Zoë,” Cordelia cautioned. “We have work to do, and there isn’t much time. I have to get the others.”
“Others?”
“The team...compadres…posse?” Cordelia was struggling not to be short with Zoë. “Once everyone is together, I can explain. There’s not time to explain the whole thing five times. So, wait here, and I’ll be back.”
“But why am I here?”
“To help me save the world…” Cordelia answered as she disappeared in her tornado of light. Zoë barely had time to think. In a flash, Cordelia was back accompanied by another woman—a brunette with blonde and red streaks in her hair. She was dressed all in leather with long leather gloves covering her hands.
“Zoë this is Gwen,” Cordelia introduced the two women. “Zoë can explain what’s going on.” Cordeila waved her arms and vanished.
“Gwen is it?”
“Yes.”
“Well, I’m not exactly sure what’s going on,” Zoë began, “I think that we’re supposed to help this woman—“
Zoë was cut off by Cordelia’s instant return with a man this time. She didn’t even bother to introduce this newcomer to Zoë and Gwen before vanishing again.
“Riley Finn,” he introduced himself holding out his right hand to Gwen.
“Gwen,” she replied not shaking his hand. “I don’t touch people.”
“Okay,” Riley was obviously creeped out. “And you are?”
“Zoë,” she replied looking Riley up and down, sizing him up. He was tall, and his muscled arms were practically bursting out of his tight t-shirt.
Cordelia materialized with the fifth member of the team, before anything else could be said.
“Sheesh,” Cordelia gasped. “This one-at-a-time-ing is going to be the death of me.” She burst out laughing, and vanished again in a flash of light.
“Riley Finn.” Riley said extending a hand to the blonde new guy.
“Andrew,” he replied shaking his hand looking Riley up and down.
“This is Gwen and Zoë,” Riley finished the introductions.
Cordelia reappeared with another young woman. Her hair was some color between blonde and brown, and she was the shortest of the group.
“Everyone,” Cordelia announced. “This is Fred.”
“Now that everyone is here, why don’t you explain what exactly is going on and why we’re all here?” Zoë asked exasperated with this whole situation.
“Excellent idea, Zoë,” Cordelia began…
“It all started about three or four years ago, in this time frame. A man and a woman fell into this forbidden relationship. He was demon fighter on the outs with his friends. She was a lawyer at an evil law firm—“
Fred interrupted, “You’re speaking of Lilah and Wesley, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” Cordelia continued. “Lilah and Wesley. Lilah was killed—“
“By you,” Gwen interrupted this time. “If I remember correctly.”
“Yes, but I was being controlled by an ancient evil power hell bent on enslaving the Earth. Let’s try to keep all the details—“
“Wait!” Zoë brought the conversation to a screeching halt. “You all know each other?”
“I don’t know any of these people,” Riley replied.
“Kinda,” Andrew said. “I know Fred, because I visited LA last year a few times to help her and Angel. But I thought you died when Illyria hijacked your body?”
“I can explain,” Fred said.
“And I only really know Cordelia by reputation,” Andrew continued. “We went to high school together in Sunnydale.” He paused to examine Gwen. “You, I don’t know.”
“I’m Gwen. I too helped Angel, Fred, Cordelia, and the gang a while back. How’s Charles?” She specifically directed her question at Fred.
“Charles is in a coma,” she said flatly. “He nearly died saving Los Angeles from the apocalypse with Angel, Spike, and Illyria.”
“Can we do this later?!?” Cordelia busted in. “We need to get started, and we’ll never get there if I don’t tell this story.”
There were nods of agreement around the circle, and Cordelia continued: “After Lilah died, she was given a final mission by the Senior Partners. To bring Angel and his friends into Wolfram and Hart. She did just that. And for her efforts, she was rewarded—with immortality, among other things. In the past two years, she’s built herself a fortress from which she can look down on all the things going on around the world. She kept an eye on Wesley all the time, because her heart still loved him. Then, in the apocalypse that Fred spoke of, Wesley was killed. Stricken by grief, Lilah decided that the best way to get over it is to destroy the earth.”
“Been there…done that,” Andrew mumbled.
“Hush!” Cordelia demanded. “Lilah is way more powerful than Willow ever could have hoped to be.” She cleared her throat. “My task is to stop her. I can’t do this on my own, which is why I’ve enlisted all of you to help.”
“Kidnapped is more like it,” Zoë added.
“Call it what you want,” she said. “But you all have a stake in this. If Lilah destroys the Earth, you’ll all die. And Zoë, neither you nor any of your friends will even exist in the future. The universe as you know it will cease to exist. Sure, I’m sure that some form of the universe will sill be around. But it won’t be this. It won’t be what you know.”
“So how do we stop her,” Riley asked.
“Glad you asked, hot stuff,” Cordelia replied. “Lilah has the elements of Thallia. With these she can open a portal to a black hole and basically suck the earth inside out.”
Cordelia surveyed the group for signs of hopelessness.
“So what, we just take away this Thallia stuff, and she’s stopped right?” Andrew asked.
“It’s not that simple Nerd-O. Lilah’s already started the ritual to open the portal. And we can’t get near her fortress with out the help of two more people—Anthony and Selena. They are the key to Lilah’s undoing, and she has them locked away at opposite ends of the world. We need to rescue each of them, bring them to Lilah’s fortress, and they will stop Lilah from sucking the world inside out.”
“So, why us?” Gwen asked. “What makes the five of us so special?”
“Yeah,” Andrew and Riley agreed in unison.
“Each of you has your own abilities, each of you has a stake in what happens here today, and each of you is destined for great things,” Cordelia explained.
“What are you talking about?” Fred asked.
“Listen, there’s really not time to—“
“You’d better explain yourself, missy,” Zoë interrupted, “or I’m not going anywhere or doing anything.”
“Ugh. Fine,” Cordeila relented. “Fred, you and Andrew are destined to take over Wolfram and Hart and bring it down from the inside out, ending centuries of evil all over the world. Riley, you and Buffy are destined to be reunited and your granddaughter will be the first prime minister of a unified Earth. Zoë, you and your band of friends in the future will lead a rebellion that will bring an end to the Alliance and bring prosperity to those suffering in the Outer Rim.”
“And me,” Gwen asked, uncharacteristically meekly. “What’s my great purpose in this life?”
“Gwen, honey, isn’t it obvious?” Cordelia looked upon her blank face and decided that she needed more of an explanation. “Gwen, you are destined to save the world alongside your great-great-great-great-great-great…oh you get the point, granddaughter.”
Gwen looked to Zoë. Zoë looked back at Gwen, and then both of the women shot glances
at Cordelia.
“What?” She said. “You and Gunn—sorry, Charles—get together, raise a family, have many beautiful children. Zoë here is your descendant. But none of this is ever going to happen if we don’t take care of Lilah and stop her from sucking the whole world inside out. Are you with me?”
“Hell yeah!” Riley yelled with true military forcefulness.
“Sounds like fun,” Zoë cheered, sarcastically.
Selena
“I don’t see why we had to split up,” Andrew whined.
“Because, Squirt, twenty-three hours is not enough time for all six of us to get this job done,” Riley explained.
“Don’t call me Squirt.”
“Come on, boys,” Fred interjected. “Play nice. We still need to rescue Selena and meet up with the others.”
Fred, Riley, and Andrew were sent via Cordelia’s light tornado the Australian outback.
Luckily, Cordy had done her research in advance and knew roughly where Andrew and Selena were being held. Unfortunately for this half of the team, neither Selena nor her demon guard were visible anywhere in the vicinity.
Andrew pulled a gismo that looked strikingly similar to a control for a remote-control car from his pocket and pressed a button on the side of it. The gismo lit up and began steadily beeping.
“What’s that?” Riley asked examining Andrew’s gismo.
“You should know, Mr. Initiative,” Andrew teased. “It’s a demon tracker. Cordelia told me that Lilah is most likely using Ha’aal demons to guard these guys. They give off a very distinct pheromone.”
“I know all about the Ha’aal,” harrumphed Riley.
The unlikely threesome walked in the barren wilderness in silence, with Andrew slightly in the lead. The beeping of the device kept its constant meter. Andrew was the first to break the silence.
“So, you never explained the whole back from the dead thing,” he directed toward Fred.
“It’s relatively simple, Andrew,” Fred explained. “You should be able to figure it out. But I’ll tell my story anyway.”
Riley looked confused.
“Fred died when Illyria took over her body. That is true. What is also true is that Illyria retained all of Fred’s memories: her time in Pylea, her love for Gunn and Wes, graduate school…everything. Angel and Wesley took away most of Illyria’s super powers to prevent her from exploding and destroying the city in the process. The human body was simply not enough to contain the essence of the god. After Angel and the others defeated the army sent by the Senior Partners, Illyria began to go insane. She could no longer distinguish herself from Fred, and it was driving her mad. That’s when they decided to go to South America and pay a visit to Willow. Willow used a spell that removed Fred’s memories and residual essence from Illyria. And Illyria was sane again. She and Spike decided to return to Los Angeles and keep the vamps and demonies under control.”
“That doesn’t explain—“ Fred cut Andrew off and continued.
“The spell that Willow used to rid Illyria of Fred was a transference spell. She shunted all the residual Fred from Illyria to the Buffybot.”
“You can do that?” Riley asked.
“Willow can do anything she sets her mind too,” Andrew replied in awe.
“After Spike and Illyria returned to LA and Angel left to join Nina and her family, Willow decided that if the Buffybot was going to be a home for Fred’s memories, that she should look like Fred. Six months later, here I am. Pretty neat, huh?”
“That’s one word for it,” Riley said.
The beeping of Andrew’s gismo grew louder and faster. “I think we’re getting close,” he said.
“Close to what?” Riley asked. “I don’t see anything.”
“There!” Andrew pointed directly ahead.
“There’s nothing there.”
Andrew put his demon tracker down, picked up a hefty stone, and heaved it forward. It drifted in midair for a second then stopped abruptly and fell to the ground with a thud. Then, as if from nowhere, the Ha’aal demon appeared before them. It stood well over seven feet tall and oozed blue pus from every pore. The stench was almost unbearable.
Riley drew his gun from the back of his pants and fired four rounds straight into the demon’s chest. Andrew laughed, “you should know that you can’t shoot a Ha’aal.”
And as if to illustrate his point, the Ha’aal demon walked closer to them pulling the bullets from its dark, gooey flesh and throwing them back at them. If it had a mouth, it would have been laughing at them.
“So, what now?” Riley looked worried.
Andrew looked to Fred. Fred looked at Riley. Riley looked to Andrew, to the demon, and back to Fred. Fred looked at the demon and a look of determination and triumph spread across her face. She ran to it. It held out a tentacled arm and stopped her like a thirteen-year-old will keep his seven-year-old brother at bay. Fred reached up and snapped the bone in its forearm three times. The Ha’aal hollered in pain. Fred kicked the demon as hard as she could in the stomach-area. The demon fell to the dirt. She grabbed its head and twisted with all her might, and the blue, oozy thing popped right off of its neck. Fred held the head triumphantly above her own head. The body teetered for a few seconds then fell to the ground.
“That’s how you kill a Ha’aal demon,” Andrew snarked.
“But where did it come from?” Riley asked. “It just appeared from no where.”
“Not no where,” Fred said, tossing the head aside and wiping her hands on her pants. “From here.” Fred walked up to an invisible wall and leaned against it.
Andrew felt along the invisible wall and found what felt like a latch. He pulled on it, and an invisible door opened, revealing a stairway. Riley led the way up the stairs with his gun drawn. Fred went next, and Andrew brought up the rear.
Lilah obviously thought that no one would be able to defeat her Ha’aal at the door. Fortunately for them (unfortunately for Lilah) she was wrong. Selena’s prison was a maze of stairways and narrow halls. Everything was painted black. Every twenty feet there was a dim red light, it made it very difficult for Riley, Andrew, and Fred to make their way around. They could have easily been lost in the maze for the rest of their lives, but again luck was on their side. Fred, after all, was a robot. She kept track of their steps and directions, and within an hour they reached the end. The final stairway led up what felt to Andrew at least thirty stories. Fred assured him that in reality it was only three and a half. The top of the stairs was what on initial inspection appeared to be a dead end. There was a red light directly above them. And Fred noticed that a tiny bump on the left wall was casting a shadow. Andrew pressed the button, and a small panel opened in the ceiling.
“How do we get up there?” Andrew wondered aloud.
His question was answered without words when Fred lifted Riley off the ground and tossed him through the opening.
“Whoa.”
“You’re next, Squirt,” Fred said. And before Andrew could object, he found himself next to Riley on the floor of a small room filled with light. Fred leapt up and joined the men. The walls of this room consisted solely of glass, as did the ceiling. The change from the darkness below to the brightness above had momentarily blinded Riley and Andrew, but soon they adapted.
There, they saw her. A small-ish woman, barely twenty-four years old with long black hair flowing down her back wearing only a white cotton bed gown stood in one corner of the room examining her rescuers.
“We’re here to rescue you,” Riley told the woman.
“We have to hurry, there’s no time,” Selena replied. She walked fast in her bare feet and dropped down the hole in the floor through which everyone had arrived.
“Ungrateful bitch,” Riley replied looking at Andrew.
Anthony
Cordelia planned her attack well, and her initial meeting place for her team was right outside Lilah’s other invisible prison. After taking Riley, Andrew, and Fred to Australia, she, Gwen, and Zoë got to their task of rescuing Selena’s twin—Anthony—from his captor.
The three women walked about half a mile through the rain forest toward where Cordelia’s memory told her Anthony was being held.
“What’s with the gloves, Grandma,” Zoë asked Gwen. “It’s like a million degrees out here.”
Gwen replied by removing her right glove. She bent down and picked up a snake with her left hand. She held the snake in the middle with her left (gloved) hand and quickly grasped the snake an inch below its head with her right. Blue electricity shot out of her hand. The snake twitched and shook violently. Smoke curled up from its body. The twitching stopped, and Gwen dropped the dead snake to the ground. “That’s why I wear the gloves, and don’t call me Grandma,” she added.
Zoë replied silently with a smile.
“There it is,” Cordelia said a minute later.
“I don’t see anything,” Zoë countered.
“It’s invisible,” Cordelia replied.
“Of course it is,” Gwen said.
“How do we—“ Zoë began. But she was interrupted when a blue, gooey, foul-smelling demon appeared before them.
The Ha’aal demon lunged for Cordelia. Cordelia vanished before the tentacles touched her. The Ha’aal swung through empty air, and Cordelia reappeared a moment later.
“Nice trick,” Gwen said.
“Thanks.”
Zoë drew her gun and fired several rounds into the demon. Nothing happened. It didn’t even seem to notice the lead slugs in its flesh.
“Gwen,” she said. “Looks like you’ll have to take this one.”
Gwen removed her gloves and charged the demon. “Come on bitch!” She yelled. “Come and get me!”
The Ha’aal demon grabbed Gwen and lifted her off the ground. Gwen grabbed back and held onto the sides of the demon’s head with both hands. Its flesh sizzled. Electricity crackled around all of them. Zoë held her nose against the stench of frying Ha’aal demon. The demon released Gwen from his grasp, but Gwen held on, dangling from the thing’s temples. The Ha’aal let out a low groan and dropped to the ground. Gwen released it and kicked it hard in the face.
“Come on,” Cordelia urged. “Time is short, and the Ha’aal won’t stay passed out for long.”
Cordelia led the way to the invisible door and pointed at the right spot. Zoë kicked it in.
“That was unnecessary,” Cordelia said. “The button’s right there.”
“Let’s get this over with,” Zoë replied.
The inside of this invisible prison was identical to Selena’s. As they made their way through the black halls of stairs, Gwen decided to get some answers.
“I thought you died,” she asked Cordelia.
“I did.”
“Oh.”
“I…transitioned,” Cordelia explained. “I think that’s what they called it. I was a great asset to the Powers when I was a human, and they gave me this afterlife. I suppose you could say I’m a Power in training. This is my first mission.”
“But how did you know about me,” Zoë asked, “in the future?”
“Time isn’t exactly linear,” Cordelia explained. “That’s one of the first things they teach you. It’s kinda like being in a room full of televisions all showing different time periods of what’s going on around the universe. It’s rather intimidating.”
“What’s a television?” Zoë asked.
“So, what’s to stop you from going to the past and changing things?” Gwen asked.
“I said not exactly linear,” Cordelia tried to explain. “We can go forward, but not back.”
“Huh?”
“Because the future hasn’t happened yet. Anything is possible. And we can see each possibility unfold.”
“So, you know what will happen if we don’t stop Lilah in time,” Zoë commented.
“Trust me, it isn’t pretty.”
No more was said of time travel. The ladies found Anthony in the same way Selena was found. And Gwen, Zoë, and Cordelia escorted him from his invisible prison. Once outside a flash of light signaled the disintegration of the invisible building.
“Now what?” Gwen asked.
“Now, we wait for the signal,” Cordelia replied.
Thallia
After about twenty minutes of sitting in the forest staring at each other, Cordelia stood up and stared at the sky.
“Oooh…” Gwen teased. “My spidey sense is tingling.”
Anthony shot Gwen a nasty look. Zoë rolled her eyes. She still couldn’t believe that she was wrapped up in all this mess. People back from the dead, an evil lawyer hell-bent on sucking the world inside out, a set of twins held captive in invisible prisons, and to top it all off, she was fighting along side her very distant relative. She shook her head in disbelief.
“It’s time,” Cordelia said. Without another word, she vanished in a poof of light.
Seconds later, she poofed back to Zoë, Gwen, and Anthony along with Fred, Andrew, Riley, and Selena.
“Selena!” Andrew shouted.
“Andrew!” Selena shouted back and went to her brother.
“NO!” Cordelia yelled stepping between the reunited twins. “Not yet.”
“Not yet, what?” Riley asked impatiently. “I thought we were in a time crunch, here.”
“We are. But if they touch each other they’ll be taken to Thallia.”
“Where’s that?” Andrew asked.
“Thallia is our sister,” Selena replied.
“She was banished from this world centuries ago,” Anthony explained. “She was evil. Pure evil. The Powers banished her to stop exactly what Lilah is trying to do now.”
“They divided her body into five pieces and imprisoned each inside a talisman,” Selena continued. “Once the pieces are reassembled and the proper ritual performed, Thallia will be reborn. Only she can open the portal of Rubidius.”
“And that’s what’s going to suck the world inside out,” Gwen confirmed.
“Yep,” Cordelia replied. “Okay. Here’s the plan…” Cordelia laid out the plan before the eight of them, and once they were done everyone joined hands starting with Selena and ending with Anthony. When Selena took Anthony’s hand, all eight of them disappeared.
“Patefacio vestri porta ut abyssus per combibo eternus nex orbis terrarum,” Lilah chanted this phrase over and over. A young woman with blonde locks of hair flowing down her back hovered about the center of a pentagram inscribed inside a circle painted on the floor. “Patefacio vestri porta ut abyssus per combibo eternus nex orbis terrarum.”
The twins mode of transport was much less dramatic than Cordelia’s, and Lilah did not even notice the arrival of the eight visitors. Two shots were fired at exactly the same time. Each hit Lilah precisely on target. She fell to the floor.
“Thalia!” Selena and Anthony shouted in unison running toward their lost-and-now-found sister.
“You can not stop what has already begun.” Ominous words from a crumpled Lilah on the floor. She stood and faced the intruders. “Stupid mortals. I can’t be killed with your mortal weapons,” she said to a dumbfounded Zoë and Riley. “Cordy! Nice to see you again. You should have prepared your minions better.”
“Stuff it,” Cordelia replied. “You don’t get to call me Cordy.”
Anthony and Selena dragged Thalia out of Lilah’s pentagram. A spherical hole appeared in the spot where Thalia had been during the ritual. It was about the size of a golf ball and steadily growing. “See,” Lilah said. “It has begun.”
“You never loved Wesley!” Fred shrieked at Lilah charging her.
Fred ran full-on into Lilah with incredible force. She held her pinned against the wall.
“My Fred, you certainly have grown big and strong. Milk certainly did your body good.”
“Lilah, you can’t do this,” Cordelia pleaded. “Have you thought about what you’re doing? The Earth and everything and everyone on it—including you—will be destroyed. Is that what you want?”
“It will end,” she replied flatly. “It always ends.”
Fred punched Lilah square in the face breaking her nose.
“You’re lucky that I heal fast, Robo-Slut.”
Lilah was still unable to escape from Fred’s grasp.
“What are we supposed to do,” Andrew asked.
“Help,” Riley answered.
Andrew did nothing. Riley did nothing. Zoë and Gwen exchanged a glance and both charged at Lilah who was still pinned against the wall by Fred. Gwen reached them first, but unfortunately her aim was off and she ran straight into Fred’s back. The shock was instant, loud, and bright. Fred and Gwen fell to the floor releasing Lilah. Smoke curled up from Fred’s mouth and nostrils; her eyes stayed fixed and open. Zoë arrived an instant later, leaping over the bodies on the floor and pinned Lilah back against the wall.
“You’re no match for me, Future Bitch,” Lilah yelled shoving Zoë back.
The two of them began throwing punches. First Lilah landed a right into Zoë’s face, and Zoë countered with a punch to Lilah’s already broken nose. The two continued this back and forth fight as Gwen tried to get back to her feet.
“Do something you two!” She shouted.
Andrew looked around the room trying to find some sort of a weapon. Riley drew his gun and tried to aim at Lilah, but the two fighting women were moving too fast and Zoë kept drifting in and out of his sights.
“Oh, you two are useless!” Gwen groaned. She rolled over and lunged for Lilah’s ankles. Lilah kicked her in the face, which scooted her back about five feet.
Meanwhile, Cordelia was talking with the triplets and the hole in the world was growing larger. It was now the size of a ripe cantaloupe and still steadily growing. Gwen could feel its pull already.
“It’s begun,” Lilah groaned kicking Zoë away from her enough to break free. “Soon, the Earth and everything on it will be gone.”
“We can’t let you do this,” Andrew said rather forcefully.
Riley and Andrew appeared on either side of Lilah. Lilah turned toward Riley and winked at him. Riley gave her a swift and very hard kick in the chest and pushed her into Andrew. Andrew jumped up and climbed onto Lilah’s back wrapping his arms around her neck.
“Silly boy,” she laughed. “I’m dead. I don’t need to breathe.”
Lilah began to spin around trying to toss Andrew from her back. Riley pulled his gun and shot Lilah again. She recoiled but still remained vertical. Gwen tried again with the ankles, and this time she was able to hold on—to both of them. Andrew pulled back. Gwen pulled forward, and Lilah fell to the ground.
“Hold the bitch down,” Zoë shouted.
The noise coming from the portal was growing so loud that Zoë had to shout to have any chance of being heard over it. The growing sphere had now reached the ceiling. Soon they would all be engulfed in its blackness.
Riley fired his gun once more and a dark red circle appeared on Lilah’s forhead.
“They sure do grow ‘em dumb in Iowa, don’t they,” Lilah laughed still pinned to the floor.
That was the last straw. Riley gave Zoë a knowing glance and they hoisted Lilah off the floor. The four of them carried her over the smoldering robot that looked like Fred and on the count of three they tossed the screaming bitch into the portal. The instant she breached the periphery of the sphere, Lilah was sucked into a tiny point of light and vanished from sight.
The hole kept growing.
“What now?” Gwen asked. “I thought the hole would close.”
“Why would you think that?” Andrew snarked back. “The only way to close The Portal of Rubidius—“
“Is for me to go through it,” Thallia finished Andrew’s sentence.
Selena and Andrew looked longingly at their sister but said nothing. Cordelia nodded, and Thallia walked up to the edge of the portal. She looked around at everyone, smiled at her brother and sister, and then jumped into the sphere. And just like Lilah, she too vanished into a point of light at the center. Without any prompting or any warning, Andrew and Selena joined hands and ran into the sphere. Within moments the sphere retracted. Everything in Lilah’s fortress was as it was before.
“I was going to say that,” Andrew said. “She didn’t let me finish.” Riley tussled Andrew’s hair and smiled.
Cordelia smiled at her assembled team. “I did it,” she said toward the ceiling.
“You mean, ‘we’ did it,” Zoë corrected.
“Yes, Zoë, we did it. We stopped Lilah and stopped the earth from being sucked inside out.”
“Not to bad for a first mission, eh?” Gwen teased.
“What about Fred,” Zoë asked.
“I can fix her,” Andrew said solemnly.
“Good job, Squirt,” Riley said tussling his hair again.
“Guh! Don’t call me Squirt!”
Zoë
“And that’s it?” Wash asked his wife.
“That’s it,” she replied.
The two of them were laying naked in bed together. Wash rolled onto his side and looked longingly at Zoë.
“And this Gwen could shoot electricity out from her hands?”
“No,” she laughed, “it didn’t shoot out. She just conducted it with her touch.”
“And she’s your grandmother?”
“Something like that,” Zoë smiled.
“I don’t believe it,” Wash said rolling onto his back.
They both sighed a deep sigh.
“So, did this Cordelia tell you anything else about the future?” Wash prodded. “Anything about us?”
“Nope,” Zoë replied. She turned to Wash and ran her index finger around his bare chest. “But I’ve got another story for you.”
“You do?” Wash was intrigued.
“Do you remember last night?”
Electric Barbarella (Short Story - Sexually Explicit)
The hum of the ship was the only sound Inara could hear from her bed onboard her shuttle. Usually, the beautiful and sultry companion had no trouble finding sleep, but tonight, she paced. She lit a candle and brewed some tea. Serenity, she thought. HA! Some name for a ship. After much struggle, Inara relented. There was only one way she was going to get to sleep. She grabbed a robe from her bed and stormed out of her shuttle putting the robe on en route.
The bubbly, red-headed mechanic, however, had no trouble what-so-ever sleeping. She laid in her bed atop the bed clothes wearing only her cotton panties. A quiet knock on her door did not rouse her. The noise grew in intensity. Eventually, Kaylee awoke, and in her still-mostly-asleep mindset, she unlocked the door, forgetting to cover herself. The panel was pushed inward, and a pair of dainty feet with toe nails painted the deepest shade of plum appeared. Kaylee recognized her visitor instantly before she had completely descended the ladder. Her panties warmed with anticipation.
Kaylee greeted Inara with a passionate kiss. Inara touched Kaylee’s exposed breasts, which sent a blaze of electricity through the young engineer’s system. Kaylee pulled Inara towards her, and together, they made their way to the bed without breaking the seal of their lips. Kaylee laid beneath her lover. Inara’s head traveled from Kaylee’s lips to her neck and to her nipple. From there, her tongue lead the way lower: down the seam of her perfectly flat stomach around her navel and lower still to the warmth that had stirred Inara from her shuttle.
Kaylee’s eyes rolled back so far in her head that she looked like she had been taken over by some sort of spirit. Beads of sweat formed at her temples, grew, and rolled down her hair line to leave dampness on the bed-sheets. Inara drove deeper with her tongue, to which Kaylee responded by arching her back and passing a loud groan of pleasure through her lips. Inara never gave up. Kaylee’s thighs pressed tight against the companion’s head. Inara’s sienna hair fell beautifully all around Kaylee’s bare legs. Kaylee’s breathing quickened, and her heart raced. Inara quickened her pace in just the right spot. Kaylee pounded her fists into the mattress repeatedly and thrust her hips forward to force Inara deeper inside of her. Kaylee’s orgasm rushed over her, and had it not been for Inara, she would have drowned in its depth. Inara left Kaylee’s womanly enclave with a wide Cheshire grin filling her beautiful face, and her lips met Kaylee’s once more. And for the first—but not the last—time that night, Kaylee tasted herself.
Captain Malcom Reynolds sat up bolt upright in his bed at that exact instant. His chiseled, bare chest covered in droplets of sweat. Panting he asked his empty bedroom, “What in the holy gorram Hell is going on here?” He laid back down in his bed with his hands behind his head. “What a dream,” he breathed. Then, his right hand left his head and traveled down to meet his engorged cock.
Twenty-four Hours Earlier…
Mal joined Wash and his wife Zoë on the bridge of Serenity. Zoë stood behind her husband massaging his shoulders while he watched the screens to be sure that they did not drift off course. Mal glanced over his shoulder.
“Wash,” he ordered pointing at the monitor. “Zoom in and enhance this quadrant.”
“Yes, si…” Wash’s voice trailed off when he realized what the captain had seen.
“Sir, please tell me that’s not what it looks like,” Zoë pleaded.
“I can’t,” Mal said flatly turning toward the entrance. He pounded a button that activated the ship-wide intercom system. “Kaylee! Kill the engines!” He shouted.
“Mal,” Wash asked wide eyed. “What do we do?”
“We just have to wait this out, that’s all,” he replied. “That’s all anyone can do.”
The ship that Mal had seen on the monitor before anyone else, which is probably why things happened the way that they did, belonged to a gang of pirates known as The Domo. But there was no way for our intrepid captain to know this, for this ship looked exactly like an Alliance cruiser, probably because it was an Alliance cruiser—one that The Domo commandeered only a few weeks before. How exactly this cruiser had managed to sneak up so close to Serenity without anyone noticing remained a mystery, and for that matter, so did the fact that the cruiser did not appear to be in pursuit of them.
“So, what,” Jayne interrupted the meeting, “we just sit here like a gorram sitting goose?”
“For now, that’s exactly what we’re going to do,” Mal said calmly.
“We need a plan,” Zoë added.
“They don’t seem to want anything to do with us,” Kaylee suggested. “We haven’t been hailed or attacked or approached. Why don’t I just fire’er up and we can get the heck outta here.”
“I, for one, do not want to attract the Alliance to us by suddenly bolting out of here,” Simon said. “There’s no need to draw them in.”
“We can’t just fucking sit here!” Jayne yelled.
“Enough!” Mal shouted, literally putting his foot down. “This is what we’re going to do,” he added, a bit calmer.
For about half an hour, Mal explained the plan to the others. Everyone agreed that it was the most sensible option; although, Jayne needed more than a little convincing.
“So, it’s all agreed,” Mal began his finish. “We begin in one hour.”
Just then, Inara burst in the room in a flourish of colorful silk and dark, wavy hair. “No!” She shouted. “You can’t.”
“And why the fuck not,” Jayne snapped at her.
“Because, look,” Inara pointed out Serenity’s front window at the Alliance cruiser.
“See that there. That’s the mark of The Domo.”
“The Domo?” Kaylee asked.
“I just received a communiqué from the Guild,” Inara explained. “They’re pirates. They steal ships, convert them into weapons of extreme terror, and use them to loot and pillage this whole sector.”
“So, what now?” Simon demanded.
“We get the heck outta here!” Wash said.
“NO!” Jayne yelled. “Are we gonna let a bunch of gorram pirates loot and pillage our sector?”
No answer from the crew.
“This is our sector, and it’s ours to loot and pillage,” Jayne continued. “Let’s blow their asses to the far outer rim!”
Everyone started to get motivated and even the captain seemed to be swayed by Jayne’s oddly passionate speech. But no one had time to get into action. The Domo made the first move.
Captain’s Prerogative
Mal finished his business after his very arousing dream and laid spent, sweaty, and sticky on his bed out of breath, when Jayne stormed into the room.
“Jayne!” Mal screamed making no attempt to cover himself. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing barging into my gorram quarters like that?”
For once in his life, Jayne was silent. His eyes were fixated on his naked captain covered in fluids. Something stirred both in his mind and in his sleeping shorts.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Jayne asked forcefully, pointing at the pool of semen between Mal’s pecs.
“That’s captain’s prerogative, Jayne,” Mal explained. “I can beat off if I choose to, and from the looks of you,” Mal eyed Jayne from head to toe. He was breathing in deep controlled breaths and tense-looking all over, and a very large, very distinct bulge was growing rapidly in his shorts. “You could use some ‘private time’ yourself.”
Comically, Mal make quote marks in the air with his fingers as he spoke.
“I have something better in mind,” Jayne said calmly. Since he was dressed for bed, all Jayne was wearing was his sleeping shorts, which were already threadbare after years of use and abuse. The flimsy fabric could barely contain his raging beast of a cock, and as soon as Jayne touched the mostly disintegrated elastic band, the beast broke free of his tiny cage. His cock was drooling juice, as Jayne pounced. He leapt from the foot of his captain’s bed and landed straddling Mal. They were both breathing heavily in each others’ faces. Mal could feel the hair on Jayne’s much more massive chest brushing his smooth pecs with each of the mercenary’s breaths. Jayne flexed his groin muscles, and his cock bounced against Mal’s. Mal hardened.
Jayne sat up, pinning the captain beneath him. “Roll over!” He shouted.
Mal obeyed.
Jayne sat straddling the captain a few seconds too long—his cock resting in the cleft of Mal’s ass.
“Jayne,” Mal whimpered. “I don’t think this is such a good idea.”
Jayne pulled his hand back and slapped Mal hard on his ass, leaving behind a large red handprint. “You’re not calling the shots any more.”
Jayne laid on Mal, his furry chest pressed tight against Mal’s back. He brought his lips to Mal’s ear and whispered, “You don’t get to be the captain tonight. I do.” And with that Jayne thrust his slobbery cock deep inside his captain. Mal cried out in pain from the mammoth size of Jayne’s dick. Jayne paid no attention to the screams, and after five or six thrusts, Mal was quiet and beginning to enjoy himself.
Jayne pounded Mal’s tight chute, making sure that Mal felt their balls slapping together with each thrust. Jayne thrust faster and faster. Sweat oozed from every pore of his body and dripped to Mal’s nakedness below him. The captain yelled into the pillow, “Fuck me, Jayne! Fuck me harder!” And Jayne complied. Jayne fucked him harder and faster. Each stroke pulled his cockhead free of Mal’s warm hole, and each thrust shoved it in deeper than it had been before. Mal grunted in time with Jayne’s thrusting even as Jayne’s thrusting sped. Faster and faster he drove into his captain. Until he could take it no longer, and he exploded, filling Mal with ounce after ounce of his hot spunk.
Jayne kept Mal pinned to his bed, which was now soaked nearly through with their sweat. Mal, who had yet to cum, began to squirm under the largeness of the mercenary’s body. But Jayne kept still; his cock still hard inside Mal.
“I need to cum,” Mal whined.
“You’ll cum when I tell you you can cum,” Jayne said. His own cum had begun to leak out of Mal’s hole around Jayne’s cock, which was still hard. Jayne began to thrust again. Mal groaned. Jayne thrust. Mal panted. Jayne thrust. Mal yelped. Jayne thrust. Then, once again, Jayne pressed his sweaty flesh against Mal’s back and whispered in his ear: “Can you be trusted?”
“Yes,” Mal panted.
“Good,” Jayne said harshly. “I’m going to need to trust you.” Jayne pulled his dripping cock out of Mal’s ass and laid next to him on his back. “Now, I want you to lick my dick clean. Suck it off, and swallow my load you gorram faggot.”
“Yes, sir,” Mal said putting his lips to Jayne’s pole and his hand to his own.
Jayne slapped his face, hard. “NO!”
Mal looked like he was on the verge of tears.
“You don’t get to touch your cock until I tell you that you can,” Jayne explained. “Now, I ask you again: can you be trusted?”
“Yes,” Mal conceded. Again, he started sucking Jayne’s cock leaving his own to drool unattended.
Mal’s head bobbed up and down on Jayne’s shaft. Jayne grabbed Mal’s head and fucked his dick into his mouth. Mal groaned his encouragements as best he could with his mouth full. Jayne groaned one last time, and without warning, he filled Mal’s mouth.
Mal crawled back up the bed and laid next to Jayne being extra careful not to touch his cock. Jayne rested for about ten more seconds, got up, put on his threadbare shorts, and left. Before he closed the door, he popped his head back in the room. “You can go ahead and touch your cock, now, sir,” he said.
Domo Arigato
In a flash the whole ship was surrounded in brilliant pink light. The lights on the bridge flickered. The engine whirred to a frenzy. Everyone’s skin tingled. Mal’s nipples hardened. And as quickly as it started, it finished. The pink energy vanished, and Serenity was once again parked staring blankly at the hijacked Alliance cruiser.
“What the fuck was that?” Jayne asked.
“I – don’t – know,” Wash stuttered finding himself curiously drawn to look toward Simon.
“Kaylee,” Mal said without taking his eyes off Jayne. “How are the engines?”
“I’ll go take a look,” Kaylee responded in a monotone voice.
“I’ll help,” Inara said running after Kaylee toward the engine room.
“Now what?” Simon asked.
“I need a nap,” Mal said.
“Me too, Cap’n,” Zoë replied leaving the bridge alone.
“Jayne, can I get your help with this thing in my quarters,” Mal said.
Jayne nodded silently and followed the captain off the bridge, leaving Simon alone on the bridge with Wash at the helm.
“I repeat,” Simon began. “Now what?” He started absentmindedly rubbing Wash’s shoulders.
“Well, for starters,” Wash replied, “you can keep doing what you’re doing, Doctor.”
Simon did as directed and continued rubbing the pilot’s shoulders. Soon, his surgical fingers were running through Wash’s blonde hair, massaging his scalp. Simon closed his eyes totally lost in the moment, totally oblivious to the danger that was staring them in the face.
Wash swiveled his chair around so he was facing Simon’s vested chest. He looked up at him and their eyes met each other. Simon leaned down and kissed Wash firm on the lips. They broke their embrace panting and gasping for air. Simon ripped his vest off; buttons flew around the bridge like bullets. Wash responded by shedding the good doctor of his shirt, while Simon unfastened his trousers. Soon Simon was naked gazing upon Wash. Wash dropped his over-shirt and unzipped his coveralls. Simon dick hardened when he saw that underneath Wash was completely naked and that he was a natural blonde.
Simon made the first move and dropped to his knees in front of Wash, taking his whole cock easily into his mouth. Wash played with Simon’s hair and moaned with delight. Slowly, so as not to interrupt Simon’s surprisingly good technique, Wash lowered himself to the floor, and soon the two men were in a sixty-nine position on the floor of the bridge.
Meanwhile…
Jayne and Mal were in a similar position in the Captain’s Quarters. Muffled groans escaped their mouths. The bed creaked with the motion of the men in heat. Mal felt his impending orgasm approach and removed his mouth from the mercenary’s cock.
“Jayne, stop or I’m gonna cum.”
Jayne complied, but said nothing.
“Roll over,” Mal ordered. “I’m gonna fuck this load into you.”
Jayne complied, but said nothing.
Mal took a moment to examine Jayne’s perfect ass displayed before him. Covered in a dark fur, much like the rest of him. He took the firm globes in his hands and spread them apart, revealing the entrance to Jayne’s rectum.
“Looks like I’m going to have to get you ready first,” Mal teased.
The captain moved his head down and began licking Jayne’s ass. Jayne humped his dick into Mal’s bed moving his ass up and down against Mal’s face. Soon, Mal’s tongue was deep inside his chute, and Jayne was groaning in sheer pleasure. Once Jayne’s asshole was sufficiently wet, Mal stopped the rimming and spit on his own cock. Jayne turned his head to see the captain’s meat. Mal rushed forward and thrust his cock deep inside him in one smooth stroke.
Jayne yelped in pain, and Mal held still. He waited almost a full minute before slowly moving his hips to push his cock deeper inside Jayne. Soon, Mal was fucking him at full force, and Jayne was feeling no pain.
“You ready for my load, soldier?” Mal asked.
Jayne groaned a wordless affirmative, and Mal stepped up the pace. His hefty balls slapping against Jayne’s. Mal yelled and slammed deeper into Jayne, which both of them did not think was possible. The force of his orgasm caused Mal to spill out of Jayne, his cum oozing onto the bed.
Jayne shucked the captain off his back and stood straddling him on the bed. Jayne fisted his beefy cock fast and furiously. In mere seconds, Jayne was shouting to the heavens and cum was raining down on Mal. Jayne collapsed next to Mal and passed out.
Mal laid silently sticky in the quarters that stank of man sex.
Elsewhere on the ship…
Kaylee hadn’t bothered to get the engines started. She and Inara made it to the engine room, but they had succumbed to the same fate as the others. Pure lust took them over, and without another thought about the Domo or the ship or impending doom, the ladies fucked as only ladies can.
Back on the bridge…
Wash had Simon bent over his pilot’s seat and was fucking him hard and fast. He was holding on to the doctor’s shoulder with one hand and his hair with the other, lost in a pleasure that he had never known with his wife. The bridge was filled with an electric energy that can only be produced by two men fucking, and Simon and Wash fed off it.
“Simon?” Wash grunted.
“What?” Simon replied pushing his ass back onto Wash’s dick.
“You want a turn?”
“Fuck yeah!”
Wash pulled his dripping cock out of Simon’s hole, and the men exchanged places. Simon’s dick was oozing so much precum that lube was the last thing from his mind. He easily slipped his cock inside Wash and began fucking him.
The pilot and the doctor kept on each other for as long as they could. But finally, Simon shot his seed on Wash’s back while Wash drenched the floor with a load of his own. Together, they collapsed to the floor panting heavily. Unfortunately, neither of them noticed that during their tryst, the hijacked Alliance cruiser began moving and now, it was encroaching painfully close to Serenity.
The Chosen One
Zoë did not adjourn to the quarters that she shared with Wash as she had intended. Instead, she ventured into Inara’s shuttle. There she was able to access the Cortex using the companion’s credentials and read up on The Domo.
“Ah ha!” she yelled in the empty shuttle.
Just then Inara returned home, but she was not alone.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing in my shuttle?” Inara asked.
“There’s no time to explain,” Zoë said. “But you have to go to sleep.”
“Sounds good to me,” Kaylee agreed.
“Alone,” Zoë ordered.
“But…” Kaylee whined.
“Just trust me. You’ll thank me in the morning.”
Zoë saw that Inara went to bed and escorted Kaylee to her own room. Her next stop was the bridge. Wash and Simon were no where to be found. Zoë grabbed the intercom, pressed the button, and spoke.
“Attention!” She yelled. “This is Zoë. I know what’s going on. The Domo have a new weapon and you are all under its control.” She paused for a bit to let the news sink in to the crew. “You must go to sleep. Alone. A full six hours of sleep is all that is required to get rid of the effects of the Electric Barbarella Ray. So, this is an order. I’m taking over the ship. Everyone go to bed in their own quarters. I’ll wake you when it’s safe.”
Jayne left Mal, still naked, asleep in his bed and returned to his quarters. Simon and Wash lay cuddled together in the bed that the pilot shared with his wife. Inara tossed and turned in a restless state on the cusp of slumber. Kaylee sat nude on her own bed, arms crossed, plotting ways to get back at Zoë for disrupting her time with Inara. Zoë examined the controls that her husband knew so well, trying to see if she could get the ship moving again.
The Domo’s ship marched silently closer and closer to Serenity. It took Zoë mere moments to realize that Kaylee had not started the engines as ordered earlier, and she ran through the ship to start them.
The Domo’s ship held its course. Zoë managed to get the engines started. She was running back toward the bridge when she ran head on into Jayne leaving Mal’s quarters wearing only his tattered underwear.
“You can go ahead and touch your cock, now, sir,” Jayne said into the room.
“Jayne!!!” Zoë screamed. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing? You’re supposed to be asleep! That’s the only way!”
“But…”
“There’s no time!” Zoë shoved past Jayne and yelled, “get back to your quarters and stay there!”
Jayne stood silently in the corridor mindlessly stroking his left nipple.
Zoë arrived back on the bridge just in time to see the look on the man at the helm of the Domo’s ship as they docked with Serenity.
“Oh Fuck.” She said to no one.
The ship shook for a second as the Domo’s docking clamps latched to Serenity’s hull. Zoë panicked for about a second and a half. Then, she hit the “Ignition” button and thrust the throttle lever all the way forward.
Serenity groaned in pain, at the same time that Wash groaned with pleasure as Simon entered him for the third time that night. The two men laid in Wash and Zoë’s bed. Simon’s chest pressed tightly against Wash’s back. His arm draped over Wash’s chest. His fingers studying Wash’s nipples intently. Slowly and rhythmically, Simon fucked him. Sliding his cock in all the way to the balls and pulling it out so far that only his head touched Wash’s stretched sphincter. With each stroke Wash groaned. Simon kept his steady rhythm not wanting to ever leave this moment.
Zoë’s effort at last paid off, and Serenity broke free of her rapist taking a sizeable chunk of the Domo’s ship with her. Zoë saw the hostile pilot in her window. His face went from triumph to terror instantly. Zoë waved her good-bye as the ship quickly turned into a speck on the view screen.
Zoë sat alone on the bridge. Would the others even remember this night? She wondered. Will I be able to tell them that the Domo had poisoned them into thinking that they were all horny homosexuals with an electromagnetic pulse? Why wasn’t I affected? Will everything be alright?
“I can answer that question for you,” a perky female voice said from no where.
“Who the hell are you?” Zoë asked the empty bridge.
A blue and white breezeless tornado of light appeared in front of her. Zoë flinched at the sight, expecting to be blown away by its force. She wasn’t, and she watched in awe as a beautiful brunette woman wearing a floor-length white evening gown materialized from nothingness.
“Everything’s going to be just fine,” the woman said.
“You haven’t answered my question,” Zoë said. “Who are you?”
“Don’t you recognize me?” The woman replied. She paused a bit thinking and continued,
“Duh. Of course you don’t. I’m Cordelia Chase.”
“Where did you come from? What happened here tonight?” Zoë babbled. “I have so many questions.”
“Zoë,” Cordelia began patiently. “I’m one of The Powers That Be.” Cordelia sauntered up next to Zoë and put her arm around her. “Your friends…and Jayne…won’t remember anything that happened tonight in the morning. That is, if there is a morning to wake up to.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I was testing you, Zoë,” Cordelia explained. “I’ve been watching you, waiting for when the time was right.”
“So, this was just a test,” Zoë was clearly trying to wrap her head around what Cordelia was tying to say. “And this Domo thing…you did that?”
“Sort of…the Domo are real. Their threat to the Outer Rim is real too, but I sent them here as a test for you—to see if you could save your friends…and Jayne...on your own. And you passed.”
“So what now?” Zoë asked. “And what about this whole ‘if there is a morning’ thing?”
“I can explain,” Cordelia replied. “But not here.”
Cordelia waved her arms in a big circle three times and in another cyclone of light, both Zoë and Cordelia were gone.
To Be Continued…
The bubbly, red-headed mechanic, however, had no trouble what-so-ever sleeping. She laid in her bed atop the bed clothes wearing only her cotton panties. A quiet knock on her door did not rouse her. The noise grew in intensity. Eventually, Kaylee awoke, and in her still-mostly-asleep mindset, she unlocked the door, forgetting to cover herself. The panel was pushed inward, and a pair of dainty feet with toe nails painted the deepest shade of plum appeared. Kaylee recognized her visitor instantly before she had completely descended the ladder. Her panties warmed with anticipation.
Kaylee greeted Inara with a passionate kiss. Inara touched Kaylee’s exposed breasts, which sent a blaze of electricity through the young engineer’s system. Kaylee pulled Inara towards her, and together, they made their way to the bed without breaking the seal of their lips. Kaylee laid beneath her lover. Inara’s head traveled from Kaylee’s lips to her neck and to her nipple. From there, her tongue lead the way lower: down the seam of her perfectly flat stomach around her navel and lower still to the warmth that had stirred Inara from her shuttle.
Kaylee’s eyes rolled back so far in her head that she looked like she had been taken over by some sort of spirit. Beads of sweat formed at her temples, grew, and rolled down her hair line to leave dampness on the bed-sheets. Inara drove deeper with her tongue, to which Kaylee responded by arching her back and passing a loud groan of pleasure through her lips. Inara never gave up. Kaylee’s thighs pressed tight against the companion’s head. Inara’s sienna hair fell beautifully all around Kaylee’s bare legs. Kaylee’s breathing quickened, and her heart raced. Inara quickened her pace in just the right spot. Kaylee pounded her fists into the mattress repeatedly and thrust her hips forward to force Inara deeper inside of her. Kaylee’s orgasm rushed over her, and had it not been for Inara, she would have drowned in its depth. Inara left Kaylee’s womanly enclave with a wide Cheshire grin filling her beautiful face, and her lips met Kaylee’s once more. And for the first—but not the last—time that night, Kaylee tasted herself.
Captain Malcom Reynolds sat up bolt upright in his bed at that exact instant. His chiseled, bare chest covered in droplets of sweat. Panting he asked his empty bedroom, “What in the holy gorram Hell is going on here?” He laid back down in his bed with his hands behind his head. “What a dream,” he breathed. Then, his right hand left his head and traveled down to meet his engorged cock.
Twenty-four Hours Earlier…
Mal joined Wash and his wife Zoë on the bridge of Serenity. Zoë stood behind her husband massaging his shoulders while he watched the screens to be sure that they did not drift off course. Mal glanced over his shoulder.
“Wash,” he ordered pointing at the monitor. “Zoom in and enhance this quadrant.”
“Yes, si…” Wash’s voice trailed off when he realized what the captain had seen.
“Sir, please tell me that’s not what it looks like,” Zoë pleaded.
“I can’t,” Mal said flatly turning toward the entrance. He pounded a button that activated the ship-wide intercom system. “Kaylee! Kill the engines!” He shouted.
“Mal,” Wash asked wide eyed. “What do we do?”
“We just have to wait this out, that’s all,” he replied. “That’s all anyone can do.”
The ship that Mal had seen on the monitor before anyone else, which is probably why things happened the way that they did, belonged to a gang of pirates known as The Domo. But there was no way for our intrepid captain to know this, for this ship looked exactly like an Alliance cruiser, probably because it was an Alliance cruiser—one that The Domo commandeered only a few weeks before. How exactly this cruiser had managed to sneak up so close to Serenity without anyone noticing remained a mystery, and for that matter, so did the fact that the cruiser did not appear to be in pursuit of them.
“So, what,” Jayne interrupted the meeting, “we just sit here like a gorram sitting goose?”
“For now, that’s exactly what we’re going to do,” Mal said calmly.
“We need a plan,” Zoë added.
“They don’t seem to want anything to do with us,” Kaylee suggested. “We haven’t been hailed or attacked or approached. Why don’t I just fire’er up and we can get the heck outta here.”
“I, for one, do not want to attract the Alliance to us by suddenly bolting out of here,” Simon said. “There’s no need to draw them in.”
“We can’t just fucking sit here!” Jayne yelled.
“Enough!” Mal shouted, literally putting his foot down. “This is what we’re going to do,” he added, a bit calmer.
For about half an hour, Mal explained the plan to the others. Everyone agreed that it was the most sensible option; although, Jayne needed more than a little convincing.
“So, it’s all agreed,” Mal began his finish. “We begin in one hour.”
Just then, Inara burst in the room in a flourish of colorful silk and dark, wavy hair. “No!” She shouted. “You can’t.”
“And why the fuck not,” Jayne snapped at her.
“Because, look,” Inara pointed out Serenity’s front window at the Alliance cruiser.
“See that there. That’s the mark of The Domo.”
“The Domo?” Kaylee asked.
“I just received a communiqué from the Guild,” Inara explained. “They’re pirates. They steal ships, convert them into weapons of extreme terror, and use them to loot and pillage this whole sector.”
“So, what now?” Simon demanded.
“We get the heck outta here!” Wash said.
“NO!” Jayne yelled. “Are we gonna let a bunch of gorram pirates loot and pillage our sector?”
No answer from the crew.
“This is our sector, and it’s ours to loot and pillage,” Jayne continued. “Let’s blow their asses to the far outer rim!”
Everyone started to get motivated and even the captain seemed to be swayed by Jayne’s oddly passionate speech. But no one had time to get into action. The Domo made the first move.
Captain’s Prerogative
Mal finished his business after his very arousing dream and laid spent, sweaty, and sticky on his bed out of breath, when Jayne stormed into the room.
“Jayne!” Mal screamed making no attempt to cover himself. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing barging into my gorram quarters like that?”
For once in his life, Jayne was silent. His eyes were fixated on his naked captain covered in fluids. Something stirred both in his mind and in his sleeping shorts.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Jayne asked forcefully, pointing at the pool of semen between Mal’s pecs.
“That’s captain’s prerogative, Jayne,” Mal explained. “I can beat off if I choose to, and from the looks of you,” Mal eyed Jayne from head to toe. He was breathing in deep controlled breaths and tense-looking all over, and a very large, very distinct bulge was growing rapidly in his shorts. “You could use some ‘private time’ yourself.”
Comically, Mal make quote marks in the air with his fingers as he spoke.
“I have something better in mind,” Jayne said calmly. Since he was dressed for bed, all Jayne was wearing was his sleeping shorts, which were already threadbare after years of use and abuse. The flimsy fabric could barely contain his raging beast of a cock, and as soon as Jayne touched the mostly disintegrated elastic band, the beast broke free of his tiny cage. His cock was drooling juice, as Jayne pounced. He leapt from the foot of his captain’s bed and landed straddling Mal. They were both breathing heavily in each others’ faces. Mal could feel the hair on Jayne’s much more massive chest brushing his smooth pecs with each of the mercenary’s breaths. Jayne flexed his groin muscles, and his cock bounced against Mal’s. Mal hardened.
Jayne sat up, pinning the captain beneath him. “Roll over!” He shouted.
Mal obeyed.
Jayne sat straddling the captain a few seconds too long—his cock resting in the cleft of Mal’s ass.
“Jayne,” Mal whimpered. “I don’t think this is such a good idea.”
Jayne pulled his hand back and slapped Mal hard on his ass, leaving behind a large red handprint. “You’re not calling the shots any more.”
Jayne laid on Mal, his furry chest pressed tight against Mal’s back. He brought his lips to Mal’s ear and whispered, “You don’t get to be the captain tonight. I do.” And with that Jayne thrust his slobbery cock deep inside his captain. Mal cried out in pain from the mammoth size of Jayne’s dick. Jayne paid no attention to the screams, and after five or six thrusts, Mal was quiet and beginning to enjoy himself.
Jayne pounded Mal’s tight chute, making sure that Mal felt their balls slapping together with each thrust. Jayne thrust faster and faster. Sweat oozed from every pore of his body and dripped to Mal’s nakedness below him. The captain yelled into the pillow, “Fuck me, Jayne! Fuck me harder!” And Jayne complied. Jayne fucked him harder and faster. Each stroke pulled his cockhead free of Mal’s warm hole, and each thrust shoved it in deeper than it had been before. Mal grunted in time with Jayne’s thrusting even as Jayne’s thrusting sped. Faster and faster he drove into his captain. Until he could take it no longer, and he exploded, filling Mal with ounce after ounce of his hot spunk.
Jayne kept Mal pinned to his bed, which was now soaked nearly through with their sweat. Mal, who had yet to cum, began to squirm under the largeness of the mercenary’s body. But Jayne kept still; his cock still hard inside Mal.
“I need to cum,” Mal whined.
“You’ll cum when I tell you you can cum,” Jayne said. His own cum had begun to leak out of Mal’s hole around Jayne’s cock, which was still hard. Jayne began to thrust again. Mal groaned. Jayne thrust. Mal panted. Jayne thrust. Mal yelped. Jayne thrust. Then, once again, Jayne pressed his sweaty flesh against Mal’s back and whispered in his ear: “Can you be trusted?”
“Yes,” Mal panted.
“Good,” Jayne said harshly. “I’m going to need to trust you.” Jayne pulled his dripping cock out of Mal’s ass and laid next to him on his back. “Now, I want you to lick my dick clean. Suck it off, and swallow my load you gorram faggot.”
“Yes, sir,” Mal said putting his lips to Jayne’s pole and his hand to his own.
Jayne slapped his face, hard. “NO!”
Mal looked like he was on the verge of tears.
“You don’t get to touch your cock until I tell you that you can,” Jayne explained. “Now, I ask you again: can you be trusted?”
“Yes,” Mal conceded. Again, he started sucking Jayne’s cock leaving his own to drool unattended.
Mal’s head bobbed up and down on Jayne’s shaft. Jayne grabbed Mal’s head and fucked his dick into his mouth. Mal groaned his encouragements as best he could with his mouth full. Jayne groaned one last time, and without warning, he filled Mal’s mouth.
Mal crawled back up the bed and laid next to Jayne being extra careful not to touch his cock. Jayne rested for about ten more seconds, got up, put on his threadbare shorts, and left. Before he closed the door, he popped his head back in the room. “You can go ahead and touch your cock, now, sir,” he said.
Domo Arigato
In a flash the whole ship was surrounded in brilliant pink light. The lights on the bridge flickered. The engine whirred to a frenzy. Everyone’s skin tingled. Mal’s nipples hardened. And as quickly as it started, it finished. The pink energy vanished, and Serenity was once again parked staring blankly at the hijacked Alliance cruiser.
“What the fuck was that?” Jayne asked.
“I – don’t – know,” Wash stuttered finding himself curiously drawn to look toward Simon.
“Kaylee,” Mal said without taking his eyes off Jayne. “How are the engines?”
“I’ll go take a look,” Kaylee responded in a monotone voice.
“I’ll help,” Inara said running after Kaylee toward the engine room.
“Now what?” Simon asked.
“I need a nap,” Mal said.
“Me too, Cap’n,” Zoë replied leaving the bridge alone.
“Jayne, can I get your help with this thing in my quarters,” Mal said.
Jayne nodded silently and followed the captain off the bridge, leaving Simon alone on the bridge with Wash at the helm.
“I repeat,” Simon began. “Now what?” He started absentmindedly rubbing Wash’s shoulders.
“Well, for starters,” Wash replied, “you can keep doing what you’re doing, Doctor.”
Simon did as directed and continued rubbing the pilot’s shoulders. Soon, his surgical fingers were running through Wash’s blonde hair, massaging his scalp. Simon closed his eyes totally lost in the moment, totally oblivious to the danger that was staring them in the face.
Wash swiveled his chair around so he was facing Simon’s vested chest. He looked up at him and their eyes met each other. Simon leaned down and kissed Wash firm on the lips. They broke their embrace panting and gasping for air. Simon ripped his vest off; buttons flew around the bridge like bullets. Wash responded by shedding the good doctor of his shirt, while Simon unfastened his trousers. Soon Simon was naked gazing upon Wash. Wash dropped his over-shirt and unzipped his coveralls. Simon dick hardened when he saw that underneath Wash was completely naked and that he was a natural blonde.
Simon made the first move and dropped to his knees in front of Wash, taking his whole cock easily into his mouth. Wash played with Simon’s hair and moaned with delight. Slowly, so as not to interrupt Simon’s surprisingly good technique, Wash lowered himself to the floor, and soon the two men were in a sixty-nine position on the floor of the bridge.
Meanwhile…
Jayne and Mal were in a similar position in the Captain’s Quarters. Muffled groans escaped their mouths. The bed creaked with the motion of the men in heat. Mal felt his impending orgasm approach and removed his mouth from the mercenary’s cock.
“Jayne, stop or I’m gonna cum.”
Jayne complied, but said nothing.
“Roll over,” Mal ordered. “I’m gonna fuck this load into you.”
Jayne complied, but said nothing.
Mal took a moment to examine Jayne’s perfect ass displayed before him. Covered in a dark fur, much like the rest of him. He took the firm globes in his hands and spread them apart, revealing the entrance to Jayne’s rectum.
“Looks like I’m going to have to get you ready first,” Mal teased.
The captain moved his head down and began licking Jayne’s ass. Jayne humped his dick into Mal’s bed moving his ass up and down against Mal’s face. Soon, Mal’s tongue was deep inside his chute, and Jayne was groaning in sheer pleasure. Once Jayne’s asshole was sufficiently wet, Mal stopped the rimming and spit on his own cock. Jayne turned his head to see the captain’s meat. Mal rushed forward and thrust his cock deep inside him in one smooth stroke.
Jayne yelped in pain, and Mal held still. He waited almost a full minute before slowly moving his hips to push his cock deeper inside Jayne. Soon, Mal was fucking him at full force, and Jayne was feeling no pain.
“You ready for my load, soldier?” Mal asked.
Jayne groaned a wordless affirmative, and Mal stepped up the pace. His hefty balls slapping against Jayne’s. Mal yelled and slammed deeper into Jayne, which both of them did not think was possible. The force of his orgasm caused Mal to spill out of Jayne, his cum oozing onto the bed.
Jayne shucked the captain off his back and stood straddling him on the bed. Jayne fisted his beefy cock fast and furiously. In mere seconds, Jayne was shouting to the heavens and cum was raining down on Mal. Jayne collapsed next to Mal and passed out.
Mal laid silently sticky in the quarters that stank of man sex.
Elsewhere on the ship…
Kaylee hadn’t bothered to get the engines started. She and Inara made it to the engine room, but they had succumbed to the same fate as the others. Pure lust took them over, and without another thought about the Domo or the ship or impending doom, the ladies fucked as only ladies can.
Back on the bridge…
Wash had Simon bent over his pilot’s seat and was fucking him hard and fast. He was holding on to the doctor’s shoulder with one hand and his hair with the other, lost in a pleasure that he had never known with his wife. The bridge was filled with an electric energy that can only be produced by two men fucking, and Simon and Wash fed off it.
“Simon?” Wash grunted.
“What?” Simon replied pushing his ass back onto Wash’s dick.
“You want a turn?”
“Fuck yeah!”
Wash pulled his dripping cock out of Simon’s hole, and the men exchanged places. Simon’s dick was oozing so much precum that lube was the last thing from his mind. He easily slipped his cock inside Wash and began fucking him.
The pilot and the doctor kept on each other for as long as they could. But finally, Simon shot his seed on Wash’s back while Wash drenched the floor with a load of his own. Together, they collapsed to the floor panting heavily. Unfortunately, neither of them noticed that during their tryst, the hijacked Alliance cruiser began moving and now, it was encroaching painfully close to Serenity.
The Chosen One
Zoë did not adjourn to the quarters that she shared with Wash as she had intended. Instead, she ventured into Inara’s shuttle. There she was able to access the Cortex using the companion’s credentials and read up on The Domo.
“Ah ha!” she yelled in the empty shuttle.
Just then Inara returned home, but she was not alone.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing in my shuttle?” Inara asked.
“There’s no time to explain,” Zoë said. “But you have to go to sleep.”
“Sounds good to me,” Kaylee agreed.
“Alone,” Zoë ordered.
“But…” Kaylee whined.
“Just trust me. You’ll thank me in the morning.”
Zoë saw that Inara went to bed and escorted Kaylee to her own room. Her next stop was the bridge. Wash and Simon were no where to be found. Zoë grabbed the intercom, pressed the button, and spoke.
“Attention!” She yelled. “This is Zoë. I know what’s going on. The Domo have a new weapon and you are all under its control.” She paused for a bit to let the news sink in to the crew. “You must go to sleep. Alone. A full six hours of sleep is all that is required to get rid of the effects of the Electric Barbarella Ray. So, this is an order. I’m taking over the ship. Everyone go to bed in their own quarters. I’ll wake you when it’s safe.”
Jayne left Mal, still naked, asleep in his bed and returned to his quarters. Simon and Wash lay cuddled together in the bed that the pilot shared with his wife. Inara tossed and turned in a restless state on the cusp of slumber. Kaylee sat nude on her own bed, arms crossed, plotting ways to get back at Zoë for disrupting her time with Inara. Zoë examined the controls that her husband knew so well, trying to see if she could get the ship moving again.
The Domo’s ship marched silently closer and closer to Serenity. It took Zoë mere moments to realize that Kaylee had not started the engines as ordered earlier, and she ran through the ship to start them.
The Domo’s ship held its course. Zoë managed to get the engines started. She was running back toward the bridge when she ran head on into Jayne leaving Mal’s quarters wearing only his tattered underwear.
“You can go ahead and touch your cock, now, sir,” Jayne said into the room.
“Jayne!!!” Zoë screamed. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing? You’re supposed to be asleep! That’s the only way!”
“But…”
“There’s no time!” Zoë shoved past Jayne and yelled, “get back to your quarters and stay there!”
Jayne stood silently in the corridor mindlessly stroking his left nipple.
Zoë arrived back on the bridge just in time to see the look on the man at the helm of the Domo’s ship as they docked with Serenity.
“Oh Fuck.” She said to no one.
The ship shook for a second as the Domo’s docking clamps latched to Serenity’s hull. Zoë panicked for about a second and a half. Then, she hit the “Ignition” button and thrust the throttle lever all the way forward.
Serenity groaned in pain, at the same time that Wash groaned with pleasure as Simon entered him for the third time that night. The two men laid in Wash and Zoë’s bed. Simon’s chest pressed tightly against Wash’s back. His arm draped over Wash’s chest. His fingers studying Wash’s nipples intently. Slowly and rhythmically, Simon fucked him. Sliding his cock in all the way to the balls and pulling it out so far that only his head touched Wash’s stretched sphincter. With each stroke Wash groaned. Simon kept his steady rhythm not wanting to ever leave this moment.
Zoë’s effort at last paid off, and Serenity broke free of her rapist taking a sizeable chunk of the Domo’s ship with her. Zoë saw the hostile pilot in her window. His face went from triumph to terror instantly. Zoë waved her good-bye as the ship quickly turned into a speck on the view screen.
Zoë sat alone on the bridge. Would the others even remember this night? She wondered. Will I be able to tell them that the Domo had poisoned them into thinking that they were all horny homosexuals with an electromagnetic pulse? Why wasn’t I affected? Will everything be alright?
“I can answer that question for you,” a perky female voice said from no where.
“Who the hell are you?” Zoë asked the empty bridge.
A blue and white breezeless tornado of light appeared in front of her. Zoë flinched at the sight, expecting to be blown away by its force. She wasn’t, and she watched in awe as a beautiful brunette woman wearing a floor-length white evening gown materialized from nothingness.
“Everything’s going to be just fine,” the woman said.
“You haven’t answered my question,” Zoë said. “Who are you?”
“Don’t you recognize me?” The woman replied. She paused a bit thinking and continued,
“Duh. Of course you don’t. I’m Cordelia Chase.”
“Where did you come from? What happened here tonight?” Zoë babbled. “I have so many questions.”
“Zoë,” Cordelia began patiently. “I’m one of The Powers That Be.” Cordelia sauntered up next to Zoë and put her arm around her. “Your friends…and Jayne…won’t remember anything that happened tonight in the morning. That is, if there is a morning to wake up to.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I was testing you, Zoë,” Cordelia explained. “I’ve been watching you, waiting for when the time was right.”
“So, this was just a test,” Zoë was clearly trying to wrap her head around what Cordelia was tying to say. “And this Domo thing…you did that?”
“Sort of…the Domo are real. Their threat to the Outer Rim is real too, but I sent them here as a test for you—to see if you could save your friends…and Jayne...on your own. And you passed.”
“So what now?” Zoë asked. “And what about this whole ‘if there is a morning’ thing?”
“I can explain,” Cordelia replied. “But not here.”
Cordelia waved her arms in a big circle three times and in another cyclone of light, both Zoë and Cordelia were gone.
To Be Continued…
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Blog Sorting
Since I have decided that I am going to be posting my personal journal stuff here instead of over at the LJ. I thought it would be nice to add a couple of links over on the side bar.
Look over at the right...
If you only want to read Maplethorpe Ridge or if you just want the personal posts, simply click the appropriate link on the right. No need to sort through miscellaneous crap, when you can have the interwebs do it for you.
Anyway, enjoy. I am still working on Chapter 1, but it will get posted up soon. Sorry for the delays there.
Look over at the right...
If you only want to read Maplethorpe Ridge or if you just want the personal posts, simply click the appropriate link on the right. No need to sort through miscellaneous crap, when you can have the interwebs do it for you.
Anyway, enjoy. I am still working on Chapter 1, but it will get posted up soon. Sorry for the delays there.
Depression and Fear
I read shit like this, and I know deep in my soul that that is exactly why I do not do drugs. If I were to ever kill myself (yes, the debate is still on, I guess, as to whether or not DJAM committed suicide), that is how I would do it. Lots of drugs and then just fall asleep.
I wont do it, because of many reasons. Mostly fear. And my cat.
There are days when Im so depressed that I can barely function. Today was one of those days, and I can just feel that tomorrow will be more of the same. I read that article this morning, and of course, being how I am, I couldnt get it out of my head all day at work.
But yeah. I dont know what to do with myself tonight, so I decided to ramble in the blog. I have zero motivation for anything; it was such a struggle at work to accomplish anything, but I did.
Im not entirely sure how Im going to snap myself out of this funk. There is just too much change going on at work. The mood has shifted. I dont like it at all. More friends are leaving my life, due to some bizarre circumstances. Im struggling to come up with a plan for the rest of my life, and I know that my time at this job is coming to a close soon (in the next few years), and I have to be ready to move on. But Im not ready to move on, and I dont really want to, either.
Okay. No one wants to read this shit.
I wont do it, because of many reasons. Mostly fear. And my cat.
There are days when Im so depressed that I can barely function. Today was one of those days, and I can just feel that tomorrow will be more of the same. I read that article this morning, and of course, being how I am, I couldnt get it out of my head all day at work.
But yeah. I dont know what to do with myself tonight, so I decided to ramble in the blog. I have zero motivation for anything; it was such a struggle at work to accomplish anything, but I did.
Im not entirely sure how Im going to snap myself out of this funk. There is just too much change going on at work. The mood has shifted. I dont like it at all. More friends are leaving my life, due to some bizarre circumstances. Im struggling to come up with a plan for the rest of my life, and I know that my time at this job is coming to a close soon (in the next few years), and I have to be ready to move on. But Im not ready to move on, and I dont really want to, either.
Okay. No one wants to read this shit.
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